This is a selection of notes from over two years of behavioral intervention sessions
with a young child who ultimately recovered completely from autism. It includes many
curricula ("drill sheets"), therapists' notes, and parents' notes, covering (in
part) the development of social skills to an age-appropriate level. The notes are by the
parents, Megan and Jim Sumlin (pseudonyms), who feel strongly that this information should
be freely available to all who might benefit from it. They ask only that these
notes belong in the public domain, and are not to be claimed or copyrighted by any person who is
or will in the future be seeking monetary gain for wide distribution of same. Feel free to
re-distribute this document, but please include this entire preface.
These notes are just one part of a comprehensive program guided by a
behavior analyst; there were other parts of the total program, not included here, that
were necessary to the child's development and eventual
recovery. They are specific
to one individual child. Use them as a resource to help you plan your child
or student's curriculum. What works for one child will not work for all. While
much of the material here addresses problems common to many or most children
with an autism spectrum disorder, you will want to select carefully based on individual
needs, learning style, and personality.
A few notes on terminology:
- SD stands for "discriminative stimulus," the instruction
given to the child.
- R is the child's (expected) response.
- NNP ('no-no-prompt') is one specific technique for presenting the
"SD," then prompting (providing the "R") if the child
responds incorrectly.
- T.O. is "time out," a (brief) removal of all
reinforcement (the child must sit and do nothing). This is meant to reduce
certain unwanted behaviors but it has no moral or emotional overtones; it is
not a punishment for "being bad."
- Reinforcement is a reward for a correct response, which may be
anything the child loves: a bit of chocolate, a piggy-back ride, an
enthusiastic "You're so great!"
Proper reinforcement is the key to learning. Much more common in these notes
is DRO, which stands for "differential reinforcement of other
behavior." In addition to reinforcement for "getting the right
answer," the child was frequently praised for unprompted appropriate
behaviors (in place of undesirable, 'stereotypical' behaviors). For example,
when playing with dolls, the therapist may say, "I'm glad you're not
banging the characters together," or as the notes say in many places,
"DRO'd flexibility"--unprompted spontenaity. Remembering to
"catch 'em being good" takes a lot of practice, but it is essential to
the development of a truly natural repertoire of age-appropriate skills.
See also: Sumlin Program Notes and Teach Me to Play and a
personal statement on overcoming autism
Back to ABA Resources
This page is rsaffran.tripod.com/social.html
Everything after this point was written by Megan and Jim Sumlin. Please note
there is no connection between this document or its authors and Carol Gray or her books
entitled "Social Stories."
Although there may be a few repeats in the stories that follow, most of the time there
will be slight differences in stories w/the same name (i.e., all Social Stories Originals
1, 2, 3 & Masters look the same, but there are differences in the wording of the
stories within each letter under those). We did this b/c we realized right from the start
that our son was memorizing the words too well and would criticize us if we'd change any
of them in the slightest. They were kept unpredictable in this way and it helped him key
into the words and what they meant instead of whether or not WE were doing them correctly.
Even if all of this is confusing (it is to me as well), if you have a child who is
ready, I hope that you could glean from these since so many of the "residual"
problems these kids have seem, at least from correspondence we've had with parents, to be
fairly universal.
The graph sheets at the beg of some of the series were for check off/initialing by
therapists (so we could keep track that they're all getting done and sometimes could
assign specific ones that weren't worked on enough within the notes). This was in a small
print font. In notes (loose-leaf sheets after the graph, at the end of this document)
they'd write which "set" (a, b, or c) of the story we were currently using
(Social Stories: Originals, 1, 2, 3, or Master) that they'd used, though the graph was the
same no matter which letter they were using. We of course preferred that whoever was there
did not use the same "set" the previous therapist did.
Here is an abbreviated version of the graph we used throughout the programs to keep
track of how many times each story had been taught:
|
Week 4/17 |
Week 4/24 |
Week 5/1 |
(etc.) |
1. Time out |
|
|
|
|
2. No answer from others |
|
|
|
|
3. Asking questions you know the answer to |
|
|
|
|
4. Other's property |
|
|
|
|
up to 24. |
|
|
|
|
To clarify: We didn't do CAROL GRAY'S social stories but rather something our
consultant showed us that was loosely based on these. As with everything we post, these
were tailor-made for our son and may or may not be appropriate for every child. There were
many, MANY pre-requisites for these stories related to the degree of language and ability
to reason that he had before we even engaged him in the very simplest forms of these
stories. We also had been working with our son on self-control, pride and confidence
statements (we'd had signs on every wall months before to alert us to continuously do
this) and TONS of scripted language (i.e., FULLY prompted conversational language) well
before we started these, so he was quite accustomed to repeating large, complicated
sentences and hearing similar language even before he really understood any of it. Our
stories obviously did contain negatives but we were instructed to balance anything we'd
write with pride and self control statements and, as I think we mentioned in brackets in
one of our stories posts, we wished we'd had done even more of these (not that we could
see that he suffered ANY for lack of -- again, we and our therapists constantly did these
in life & therapy before, during and since).
Certainly, there are other ways to create and deliver stories like these. We're posting
the ones we wrote because they worked for our son and more and more became the primary
focus of our endgame.
These interventions should of course be discussed with your consultants &/or team
to determine whether or not they (or some variation) would be appropriate either at the
point of therapy you're at, at some future time, or at all.
1. TIME OUT - Sometimes grown-ups send me to a timeout when I don't listen.
- What are you supposed to do in a timeout?
- What do grown-ups think if you don't listen? A: They think I don't know how to
listen.
- I can control myself so I don't get timeouts
- I can listen to grown-ups
2. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS - Sometimes people don't answer when you talk to them
- Maybe they didn't hear you.
- Maybe they weren't paying attention.
- Maybe they were busy.
- Maybe they just didn't want to talk to you.
- It's not my job to make people answer me.
- I can just forget about it, maybe they'll talk to me later.
3. ASKING ?s YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO - It's not good to ask questions that I know the
answer to.
- It's boring to others.
- People might think I can't remember the answers.
- People might think I'm dumb.
- People might think I'm testing them & that will make them feel angry.
- If I want to talk to someone I can ask a question that I don't know the answer to.
4. TOUCHING OTHER'S PROPERTY - I should not touch other people's things.
- I might break it & that would upset people and make them mad at me.
- If someone did that to me I'd be upset.
- When [brother] takes my toys, I worry he'll break them.
- [Brother] does it because babies don't know better.
- I know better; I can remember not to touch people's things.
5. CIRCLE TIME - In circle time I listen to the teacher.
- If I talk to the other kids, the teacher will be upset because I'm not paying
attention to her.
- The other kids might think I'm a bad boy who doesn't listen to rules.
- When I listen to the teacher, I learn.
- Learning is fun; I can remember to listen to the teacher.
6. LEAVING ACTIVITY - I talk to the kids that I'm playing with.
- It's important not to talk to kids playing with other kids
- If I talk to kids playing other games, my friends will be sad, they'll think I'm
ignoring them.
- They might not want to play with me next time.
- If I only talk to my friends we have fun together
- Next time they'll play with me again.
7. TUNING IN TO PEOPLE - I only think about what people are saying or doing.
- When I remember to do this, I make friends and I know what's going on.
- If I think about other things I can get distracted, I might even get stuck.
- People will think I'm weird and they won't want to play with me.
- I will always think about what people are saying and doing.
8. PREDICTING - I should not try to guess what's going to happen later
- Surprises are fun.
- If I try to guess, I miss out on good things.
- I might even miss a surprise.
- I'll remember not to predict.
9. CALLING OUT - Whenever I want to talk to someone, I need to walk over & speak
to them.
- That's the polite thing to do.
- When people call out, they disrupt the whole room; everyone gets distracted.
- If I call out, people might think I don't understand the way to do things.
- I'll be able to walk over to people when I want to talk to them.
10. NOT LISTENING - It's important to look at people and stop what I'm doing when they
have something to tell me.
- Sometimes grown-ups tell me very important things that I need to know.
- If I don't look & listen I might miss something important and make the grown-ups
angry.
- I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when grown-ups want me to listen.
- I will listen to grown-ups when they talk to me.
11. RULES - I'm not allowed to make up rules.
- Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
- Children don't know how to make up rules; they make up silly rules.
- I can learn a lot from the rules grown-ups make.
- If I make up rules, grown-ups will be upset with me.
- They will think I'm trying to boss them around.
- I'll act like a little boy, that's what I am.
12. LEAVING OBJECTS WHEN GROWN-UP CALLS - When a grown-up calls me I need to
immediately stop what I'm doing and go to them.
- They might have something to tell me that I need to know right away.
- If I don't go right away I won't hear what I need to know.
- Grown-ups don't like children who don't listen.
- I will listen to grown-ups.
13. STEPPING ON THINGS - When I'm walking someplace I need to look everywhere in front
of me.
- That's important for everyone's safety.
- If I don't look, I might step on something and break it.
- I might trip and hurt myself.
- I might bump into someone or something.
- I don't like breaking things or getting hurt so I'll always look where I'm going.
14. INTERRUPTING - I can't interrupt when others are having a conversation or are busy
with something.
- It's not polite
- If it's extremely important, I can tap the person on the shoulder and say excuse me,
otherwise I must be patient and wait until they're finished.
- Interrupting makes people angry because you stop them from talking and they might
forget what they were talking about.
- Everyone deserves to talk without being interrupted.
- Grown-ups like polite children
- They're especially proud of children who do not interrupt.
- Sometimes I might think it's important and the grown-up will tell me it's not. If
that happens, I need to wait patiently.
15. PERSONAL SPACE - When I talk to people I need to give them their space and stay
away from their faces.
- When people come too close it makes other people uncomfortable.
- Everybody needs space.
- When I make people uncomfortable, they want to get away from me.
- They might not want to ever talk to me again.
- When I give people enough space, I get to play with and talk to people, I make
friends and have fun.
16. WALKING FROM CONVERSATION - I never turn away from anyone when I'm in a
conversation.
- Looking at people is an important part of talking to them.
- If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
- They will think I don't care about them.
- It's impossible to understand what someone is saying when you're not looking at them.
- People like me better when I look at them, it makes them want to talk to me more.
- I promise to look at everyone who talks to me.
- I want to be a good friend.
17. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME - It's important to listen to grown-ups the first time.
- Grown-ups know when I'm getting stuck.
- I can't always tell them about myself.
- The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for a second.
- When I listen, grown-ups are proud of me and I'm proud of myself.
- If I don't listen grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't know how to listen.
- Big boys listen the first time.
- I'm a big boy.
18. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST - It's important to do my best in everything I do.
- I need to make everything I do as good as it can possibly be.
- When I do my best, I'm really proud of myself and other people say good things about
my work.
- Doing my best means ________ (pressing hard, doing it quietly, coloring in the
lines...)
- When I don't do my best it's because I'm being lazy.
- Lazy people finish things last, miss things and lose games.
- People aren't proud of other people when they don't try their best.
- I'll always try to do my best and work hard, that way I'll get the most out of
everything.
19. I MUST TALK - Sometimes I want to say things very badly, it feels like I have to
say it right that second.
- It's important to wait until the other person is finished talking.
- Even though it feels important, it can wait.
- They will listen to me better if I wait patiently.
- When I interrupt, it just angers people.
- People wonder, "what's wrong with him?", "why can't he wait?"
- If I can wait, I can tell them later.
Each story consists of three sections:
1. The OPENING STATEMENT
(keep this as close to the original as possible).
[You can tell from the following -- Bullet Pts. -- that these notes were written with
the original Social Sentences in mind, but it was hard for all the therapists to put the
stories in their own words until they had many stories, probably even different versions
of same stories, memorized well. This is probably an additional reason why it was good to
go with our "three-version" method (additional to that he was memorizing them)]
2. BULLET POINTS
[Our original stories were titles w/bullet points. Our team had to improvise around
these. Later, we created three versions of full-blown stories.] Each social story contains
several bullet points for you to touch upon. You've got leeway to improvise here since
these are general themes that are put into your own words.
3. Always end with a CONFIDENCE STATEMENT ("I can do it.", etc.)
These stories give a rationale for "why" you do things in certain
situations.
These stories also work hand in hand with perspective taking.
EXPANDED EXPLANATIONS OF BULLET POINTS
1. After reading the OPENING STATEMENT (as close to verbatim as possible), look at each
BULLET POINT and read it from any perspective (his, yours, ours, people's...)
e.g., "People like me better when I look at them; it makes them want to talk to me
more."
The bullet point above can be delivered several ways (be sure to keep shifting the
POINT OF VIEW):
a. As a statement read to him (exactly as above) b. As a scripted answer delivered by
him to the question, "Do you ever walk away from someone when they're talking to
you?" c. Ask him, "How would YOU feel if I walked away from you when you spoke
to me?" and script the above answer as "I would like you better if you looked at
me."
2. Remember, each BULLET POINT is a THEME that you can play with as above. Take some
time to discuss some of these themes and return to them more than once as you cover each
topic. DO NOT ZIP THROUGH THESE WITH HIM. Make sure he's attentive and is trying to
comprehend what you're saying. These are to be treated as stories/conversations. Pause
here and there to give him a space to comment in between your scripting.
3. Other themes can bleed across boundaries ("getting stuck" fits in many
places).
***ALWAYS CLOSE WITH A CONFIDENCE STATEMENT
TO GET A COMPLETE PICTURE OF THE VARIATIONS ON DELIVERING THE BULLET POINTS, CHECK OUT
THE VIDEO WHERE WE WORK "LISTENING TO A GROWN UP THE FIRST TIME" TO DEATH
THROUGHOUT THE TAPE. [this was probably a videotape from a follow-up workshop w/our
consultant]
METHODS OF DELIVERING STORIES
Here are some of the ways we recall that we presented the Social Stories.
1. Read them to him.
2. Acted out with dolls and puppets (with him only as an observer). When we got to the
"behavior" we would stop and de-brief him about what happened.
e.g., SD: "Why did they walk away?"
Then we would re-enact the scene (or crime!) without the offending behavior and have a
positive outcome and de-brief again.
e.g., SD "Why did they stay and play with him?"
3. Once he could handle it, we had him join in the doll/puppet play with his doll or
puppet being the one reacting to the weird/ inappropriate behavior. Then we would ask him
why his doll/puppet was nice/mean to the offending doll/puppet. This was very reinforcing
to him and gave him a chance to contemplate someone else's perspective of his behaviors
(empathy).
4. We acted out stories on a flannel board (similar to dolls/puppets) and later had him
join in (again de-briefing...we ALWAYS de-briefed, no matter what method we used for the
stories).
5. Since he was able to read we would have him read the stories to us or trade lines
from the stories with us.
6. Since he was writing we would sometimes write questions (as part of the de-briefing)
and have him write the answers.
7. We used the Grolier "Help Me Be Good" Books extensively, either reading
them to him or having him read them to us. Or sometimes making up stories using the
pictures. We ALWAYS de-briefed (e.g., "why is that boy making that face?",
etc.).
8. Sometimes we did "overlapping sessions" where the last half hour of one
therapist's session overlapped with the first half hour of the next. The two therapists
could then overlap and role play various social stories and de-brief. Even if only one
therapist were available, they could role play one of his behaviors and then de-brief him
("How do you feel when I ignore you?", etc)
9. Whenever we could (rare for us but it happened), we would get an older NT child to
play with him. We would let them play and then prompt (whisper in the NT kid's ear) a
response that was a negative reaction to any inappropriate behavior ("I'm not playing
with you; you're making weird faces"; "If you don't look at me it makes me
upset"). This was critical since it was an early phase of transferring stimulus
control to other kids. As mean as it sounds, we wanted other children to get upset with
him when he behaved inappropriately so we could de-brief him later. This had a tremendous
impact and made him really WANT to play with others appropriately.
The Social Stories have specific topics (Personal Space, Acting Weird, Interrupting,
etc.). Once we were rolling with all the previous things mentioned, we were able to use
many of the familiar expressions we created in these stories in real life to deal with
these situations. (e.g., "Who gets good things?" "Good boys get good
things"). So we constantly generalized these stories and de-briefed in real life when
the situations came up. We also created new Social Stories all the time as new situations
arose (and added them into the many ways we used them mentioned previously).
1. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I like talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
- Sometimes they don't answer when I talk to them.
- Maybe they didn't hear me or maybe they weren't paying attention
- Maybe they were busy or maybe they just didn't want to talk to me.
- It's not my job to make people answer me.
- I can just forget about it, maybe they'll talk to me later.
2. WAITING MY TURN
- I LOVE doing great work in school.
- When I'm REALLY proud of what I do, I'm in a hurry to show all of my teachers.
- SOMETIMES the teacher is busy with ANOTHER child and I walk over, stick my work in her
face and say, "HERE!"
- THIS makes the teacher VERY uncomfortable and annoyed and MAD at me.
- I don't blame her -- I would feel the same way if someone did that to ME!
- It would be better if I WAITED my turn and then gave it to her.
- When I stand PATIENTLY and WAIT my turn, I still get to show off my great work and
nobody will be MAD at me.
- I KNOW that good things happen to people who wait patiently.
- I CAN wait for my turn.
3. NOT LISTENING
- When people talk to me, it's usually something I need to hear.
- It's important to look at people & stop what I'm doing when they have something to
tell me.
- Sometimes grown-ups tell me VERY important things that I need to know.
- If I don't look & listen I might miss something important and make someone mad.
- I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when grown-ups want me to listen.
- When people talk to me, I will STOP what I'm doing and look & listen to them.
4. TOUCHING OTHER PEOPLE OR THEIR THINGS
- I should NEVER touch other people's things without asking permission first.
- I might break it and that would upset people and make them mad at me.
- NOBODY likes people who touch their property.
- If someone did that to me I'd be upset.
- I also shouldn't touch people in a weird way.
- [Brother] does it because babies don't know any better.
- But I know better and I can remember not to touch people's things or touch them in a
weird way.
5. LEAVING ACTIVITY
- I LOVE playing with other kids.
- I talk to the kids I'm playing with.
- If I talk to kids playing other games, MY friends will be sad and think I'm ignoring
them.
- They'll think I don't like them.
- They might not want to play with me next time.
- If I ONLY talk to my friends we'll have fun together
- Next time they'll play with me again.
6. TIME-OUTS
- Sometimes grown-ups send me to a time-out when I don't listen.
- When I'm in a time-out, I'm VERY quiet.
- I think about what I did wrong and I feel VERY sad.
- I don't want anyone to think I don't know how to listen.
- I CAN be good and control myself so I WON'T get time-outs.
- I CAN listen to grown-ups.
7. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- It's important to sit still when I'm sitting and stand still when I'm standing.
- When I don't sit or stand still I get distracted and have trouble following what's
going on.
- The other problem is that everyone else gets distracted too since they start staring at
the way I'm moving and forget to listen to me.
- I hate when people don't listen to me and I know I can get them to listen to me by
staying in one place.
- Even though I get excited when I talk to people, I can control myself and stay still.
- This way I'll have more friends pay attention to me.
8. BELL RINGS
- I know when I'm in school there are many rules that I have to follow.
- When I follow the rules in school I make my teachers proud and the other kids know I'm
a good boy.
- One of the rules in my new school is that when the teacher rings the bell, I have to
stop whatever I'm doing.
- When the bell rings it means the teacher has something important to say so I know I
better look at her and listen carefully.
- If I'm good when the bell rings, I can earn a star.
- It's easy to stop what I'm doing and listen to the teacher when the bell rings.
- That's because I know how to follow rules and listen to grown-ups.
9. MY HANDS
- Sometimes I think about my hands and the weird things I can do with them.
- The problem is, I can't think about ANYTHING else when I'm playing with my hands.
- The best thing to do is to keep my hands QUIET and on my lap.
- If I'm in school I can also fold them quietly.
- I can NEVER pick them.
- I can NEVER play with my fingers.
- These are the things that make me TOTALLY stuck.
- I CAN remember to keep my hands quiet on my lap.
- It's NOT that hard, I CAN control myself.
- When I stop thinking about my hands, I can concentrate on other things.
- I'm proud when I'm NOT thinking about my hands.
10. TASK LAZINESS / DOING MY BEST
- It's SO important to do my best in EVERYTHING I do.
- I need to make everything I do as good as it can possibly be.
- When I do my best I'm REALLY proud of myself & others say good things about my
work.
- When I DON'T do my best it's because I'm being lazy.
- Lazy people finish things last, miss out on things and lose games.
- NOBODY'S proud of me when I don't try hard.
- I'll always try to do my best and work HARD so I'll get the most out of everything.
- That will make ME very happy.
11. RULES
- Rules are important for EVERYONE.
- I'm not allowed to make up rules.
- Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
- Children don't know how to make up rules -- they make up silly rules.
- I can learn A LOT from the rules grown-ups make.
- If I make up rules, grown-ups will be upset with me.
- They'll think I'm trying to boss them around.
- I won't make up rules because that's a grown-ups job.
12. EARNING STARS
- One thing I love about my new school is that good boys and girls get good things.
- When I do something good in school, the teacher gives me a star.
- If I stop what I'm doing and put my things away when the bell rings I can get a star.
- Helping to clean up gets me stars as long as I don't throw things and put it away nice.
- At the end of the day I can exchange my stars for good things like stickers or candy.
- Earning stars and getting stickers and candy is a special part of my new school that I
like a lot.
13. WEIRD THINGS
- All the strange things I do are NOT a good idea.
- People stare at me and laugh AT me (and not WITH ME) when I act weird.
- I get stuck on these things whether its my hands, my feet, my mouth or my eyes.
- Sometimes when grown-ups tell me to stop doing a weird thing, I think of ANOTHER weird
thing I can do instead.
- Instead of thinking about OTHER weird things to do, I SHOULD think of ways to be good.
- When I'm GOOD I can get lots of good things.
- It's hard, but I CAN do it.
14. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I want to say things VERY badly.
- It feels like I HAVE to say it RIGHT THAT SECOND.
- It's important to wait until the other person is finished talking.
- Even though it FEELS important, it CAN wait.
- They will listen to me BETTER if I wait patiently.
- When I interrupt, it just ANGERS people.
- People wonder, "what's wrong with him?" and "why can't he wait?"
- If I can wait, I can STILL tell them later and EVERYONE will like me MORE.
15. CALLING OUT
- Sometimes I want to get the attention of someone who is far away.
- Whenever I want to talk to someone, I need to walk over and speak to them.
- That's the polite thing to do.
- When people call out, they disrupt everything and everyone gets distracted.
- If I call out, people might think I'm rude.
- I KNOW how to be polite and walk over to people when I want to talk to them.
16. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- It's IMPORTANT to listen to grown-ups the first time.
- I don't know when I'm getting stuck, but grown-ups always KNOW when I am.
- I can't always talk about myself.
- The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for a second.
- When I listen, grown-ups are proud of me and I'M proud of myself.
- If I don't listen, grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't know HOW to listen.
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time.
- I'm a big boy because I ALWAYS listen the first time.
17. LOOKING WHERE I'M GOING
- When I'm walking someplace I need to look EVERYWHERE in front of me.
- That's important for EVERYONE'S safety.
- If I DON'T look, I might step on something and break it.
- Something might come crashing into me and hurt me bad.
- I might trip and hurt myself.
- I might bump into someone or something.
- I don't like breaking things or getting hurt so I'll always look where I'm going.
- When I look, I can get out of the way if something dangerous is coming at me.
- I'm SO proud when I remember to watch where I'm going.
18. PACING
- Sometimes I do things for a VERY long time.
- I know that I have to save up my energy so I don't get tired later.
- I always have to pace myself and NOT get TOO wild or I will get tired and have trouble
paying attention later.
- If I have trouble paying attention, my friends will think I'm ignoring them and they
will look for other people to play with.
- If I stay calm and pace myself, I'll be able to do great for a VERY long time.
19. GROWN UPS ARE DIFFERENT FROM KIDS
- Grown-ups are in charge and make the rules and decide things.
- Grown-ups have different sets of rules than kids.
- They make up the rules for grown-ups and kids.
- Kids never make up rules for anyone.
- It seems unfair since kids can't do all the things that grown-ups can.
- It's important to respect what grown-ups say and do, they know best.
- I can learn a lot from grown-ups especially if I follow their rules.
20. WALKING FROM CONVERSATION
- I LOVE to hear what other people have to say.
- I NEVER turn away from anyone when I'm in a conversation.
- Looking at people is a VERY important part of talking to them.
- If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
- They will think I don't care about them.
- It's impossible to understand what someone is saying when you're not looking at them.
- People like me better when I look at them, it makes them WANT to talk to me.
- I promise to stay still and look at everyone who talks to me.
- I'm want to be a good friend and I'm PROUD to be a good friend.
21. DAYDREAMING
- I LOVE hearing what other people say and WATCHING what other kids & people do.
- When I'm with other people, I pay attention and ONLY think about what they are saying
or doing.
- When I remember to do this, I'm proud to make friends and know what's going on.
- If I daydream and think about other things, I can get distracted and might even get
stuck.
- People will think I'm weird and won't want to play with me.
- I never daydream and ALWAYS think about what people are saying and doing.
22. CIRCLE TIME
- I like circle time because I learn and have fun at the same time.
- In circle time I always listen to the teacher.
- If I talk to other kids, the teacher will be upset because I'm not paying attention to
HER.
- And if I DON'T pay attention to her, I might miss something fun.
- Other kids may think I'm a bad boy who doesn't listen to rules.
- When I listen to the teacher, I learn new things and have a GREAT time.
- Learning is fun...I'm so proud to always remember to listen to the teacher.
23. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- People ask me things ALL the time.
- I KNOW when someone asks me something it's because they want me to answer.
- When I DON'T answer, grown-ups and other kids might think I don't like them.
- I hate when people don't answer MY questions so I KNOW how THEY must feel when I don't
answer them.
- I know I have important things to say and that's why people ask me things.
- I will ALWAYS answer EVERYONE the FIRST time so I can have lots of friends.
24. DOING THINGS QUICKLY
- Part of pacing yourself is learning to do things quickly.
- Dawdling and stalling isn't good because you can finish things last.
- When I finish last, I miss out on playing games with other kids.
- If I take to long to join an activity I might miss something.
- I'll have less time to play with other kids.
- I want to be part of the group and be part of the action.
- I won't stall, I'll do things quickly and always know what's going on.
- I'm very proud of myself when I do things quickly
1. TIME-OUTS
- Sometimes grown-ups send me to a time-out when I don't listen.
- When I'm in a time-out, I'm VERY quiet.
- I think about what I did wrong and I feel VERY sad.
- I don't want anyone to think I don't know how to listen.
- I CAN be good and control myself so I WON'T get time-outs.
- I CAN listen to grown-ups.
2. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I like talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
- Sometimes they don't answer when I talk to them.
- Maybe they didn't hear me or maybe they weren't paying attention.
- Maybe they were busy or maybe they just didn't want to talk to me.
- It's not my job to make people answer me.
- I can just forget about it, maybe they'll talk to me later.
3. ASKING ?s YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO
- I know it's not good to ask questions that I know the answer to.
- When I do that people may think I'm dumb or can't remember the answer.
- It's SO boring to others to talk about things we already know.
- People might think I'm testing them & that will make them feel angry.
- If I want to talk to someone, I can ask a question that I DON'T know the answer to.
- I only ask questions when I DON'T know something and I want to learn.
4. TOUCHING OTHER'S PROPERTY
- I should NEVER touch other people's things without asking permission first.
- I might break it and that would upset people and make them mad at me.
- NOBODY likes people who touch their property.
- If someone did that to me I'd be upset.
- When [brother] takes my toys, I worry that he'll break them.
- [Brother] does it because babies don't know any better.
- But I know better and I can remember not to touch people's things.
5. CIRCLE TIME
- I like circle time because I learn and have fun at the same time.
- In circle time I always listen to the teacher.
- If I talk to other kids, the teacher will be upset because I'm not paying attention to
HER.
- And if I DON'T pay attention to her, I might miss something fun.
- Other kids may think I'm a naughty boy who doesn't listen to rules.
- When I listen to the teacher, I learn new things and have a GREAT time.
- Learning is fun...I can always remember to listen to the teacher.
6. LEAVING ACTIVITY
- I LOVE playing with other kids.
- I talk to the kids I'm playing with.
- If I talk to kids playing other games, MY friends will be sad and think I'm ignoring
them.
- They'll think I don't like them.
- They might not want to play with me next time.
- If I ONLY talk to my friends we'll have fun together
- Next time they'll play with me again.
7. TUNING IN TO PEOPLE
- I LOVE hearing what other people say and WATCHING what other kids & people do.
- When I'm with other people, I ONLY think about what they are saying or doing.
- When I remember to do this, I'm proud to make friends and know what's going on.
- If I think about other things, I can get distracted and might even get stuck.
- People will think I'm weird and won't want to play with me.
- I ALWAYS think about what people are saying and doing.
8. PREDICTING
- Surprises are FUN!
- I should NEVER try to guess what's going to happen later.
- If I try to guess, I may RUIN a surprise and miss out on it.
- I'll remember not to predict. That way it's MUCH MORE FUN!
9. CALLING OUT
- Sometimes I want to get the attention of someone who is far away.
- Whenever I want to talk to someone, I need to walk over and speak to them.
- That's the polite thing to do.
- When people call out, they disrupt everything and everyone gets distracted.
- If I call out, people might think I'm rude.
- I KNOW how to be polite and walk over to people when I want to talk to them.
10. NOT LISTENING
- When people talk to me, it's usually something I need to hear.
- It's important to look at people & stop what I'm doing when they have something to
tell me.
- Sometimes grown-ups tell me VERY important things that I need to know.
- If I don't look & listen I might miss something important and make someone mad.
- I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when grown-ups want me to listen.
- When people talk to me, I will STOP what I'm doing and look & listen to them.
11. RULES
- Rules are important for EVERYONE.
- I'm not allowed to make up rules.
- Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
- Children don't know how to make up rules -- they make up silly rules.
- I can learn A LOT from the rules grown-ups make.
- If I make up rules, grown-ups will be upset with me.
- They'll think I'm trying to boss them around.
- I won't make up rules because that's a grown-ups job.
12. LEAVING OBJECTS WHEN A GROWN-UP CALLS
- Sometimes I'm busy with something and a grown-up calls me.
- When grown-ups call me I need to IMMEDIATELY stop what I'm doing & go to them.
- They might have something to tell me that I need to know right away.
- If I don't go right away I WON'T hear what I need to know.
- Grown-ups don't like children who don't listen.
- I will listen to grown-ups IMMEDIATELY when they call me.
13. STEPPING ON THINGS
- When I'm walking someplace I need to look EVERYWHERE in front of me.
- That's important for EVERYONE'S safety.
- If I DON'T look, I might step on something and break it.
- I might trip and hurt myself.
- I might bump into someone or something.
- I don't like breaking things or getting hurt so I'll always look where I'm going.
- I'm SO proud when I remember to watch where I'm going.
14. INTERRUPTING
- Sometimes other people are having a conversation without me.
- I CAN'T interrupt when others are having conversations or are busy.
- It's not POLITE to interrupt.
- If it's EXTREMELY important, I can tap their shoulder and say "excuse me".
- Sometimes I still have to wait a little longer, even if I say "excuse me."
- And SOMETIMES they won't even excuse me!
- Interrupting makes people angry because you stop them from talking and they may forget
what they were talking about.
- EVERYONE deserves to talk without being interrupted.
- Grown-ups like polite children.
- They're ESPECIALLY proud of children who do not interrupt.
- I make EVERYONE proud when I don't interrupt.
15. PERSONAL SPACE
- I love talking to people, especially my friends.
- When I talk to people, I need to give them their space & stay away from their
faces.
- EVERYBODY needs space.
- When I get too close, it makes other people uncomfortable.
- When I make people uncomfortable, they want to get away from me.
- They might not want to ever talk to me again.
- When I give people enough space, they want to talk with me and be my friend.
16. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
- I LOVE to hear what other people have to say.
- I NEVER turn away from anyone when I'm in a conversation.
- Looking at people is a VERY important part of talking to them.
- If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
- They will think I don't care about them.
- It's impossible to understand what someone is saying when you're not looking at them.
- People like me better when I look at them, it makes them WANT to talk to me.
- I promise to stay still and look at everyone who talks to me.
- I'm want to be a good friend and I'm PROUD to be a good friend.
17. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- It's IMPORTANT to listen to grown-ups the first time.
- I don't know when I'm getting stuck, but grown-ups always KNOW when I am.
- I can't always talk about myself.
- The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for a second.
- When I listen, grown-ups are proud of me and I'M proud of myself.
- If I don't listen, grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't know HOW to listen.
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time.
- I'm a big boy because I ALWAYS listen the first time.
18. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST
- It's SO important to do my best in EVERYTHING I do.
- I need to make everything I do as good as it can possibly be.
- When I do my best I'm REALLY proud of myself & others say good things about my
work.
- When I DON'T do my best it's because I'm being lazy.
- Lazy people finish things last, miss out on things and lose games.
- NOBODY'S proud of me when I don't try hard.
- I'll always try to do my best and work HARD so I'll get the most out of everything.
- That will make ME very happy.
19. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I want to say things VERY badly.
- It feels like I HAVE to say it RIGHT THAT SECOND.
- It's important to wait until the other person is finished talking.
- Even though it FEELS important, it CAN wait.
- They will listen to me BETTER if I wait patiently.
- When I interrupt, it just ANGERS people.
- People wonder, "what's wrong with him?" and "why can't he wait?"
- If I can wait, I can STILL tell them later and EVERYONE will like me MORE.
20. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- People ask me things all the time.
- I know when someone asks me something it's because they want me to answer.
- When I don't answer, grown-ups and other kids might think I don't like them.
- I hate when people don't answer my questions so I know how they must feel when I don't
answer them.
- I know I have important things to say and that's why people ask me things.
- I will always answer everyone the first time so I can have lots of friends.
21. PACING
- Sometimes I do things for a very long time.
- I know that I have to save up my energy so I don't get tired later.
- I always have to pace myself and not get too wild or I will get tired and have trouble
paying attention later.
- If I have trouble paying attention, my friends will think I'm ignoring them and they
will look for other people to play with.
- If I stay calm and pace myself, I'll be able to do great for a very long time.
22. WEIRD THINGS
- All the strange things I do are not a good idea.
- People stare at me and make fun of me when I act weird.
- I get stuck on these things whether its my hands, my feet, my mouth or my eyes.
- Sometimes when grown-ups tell me to stop doing a weird thing, I think of another weird
thing I can do instead.
- Instead of thinking about other weird things to do, I should think of ways to be good.
- When I'm good I can get lots of good things.
- It's hard, but I can do it.
23. WAITING YOUR TURN
- I love doing great work in school.
- When I'm really proud of what I do, I'm in a hurry to show all of my teachers.
- Sometimes the teacher is busy with another child and I walk over and stick my work in
her face and say, "here!"
- This makes the teacher very uncomfortable and annoyed.
- I don't blame her, I would feel the same way if someone did that to me.
- It would be better if I waited my turn and then gave it to her.
- When I stand patiently and wait my turn, I still get to show off my great work and
nobody is mad at me.
- I know that good things happen to people who wait patiently.
- I can wait for my turn.
24. MY HANDS
- Sometimes I think about my hands and the weird things I can do with them.
- The problem is, I can't think about anything else when I'm playing with my hands.
- The best thing to do is to keep my hands quiet and on my knees.
- If I'm in school I can also fold them quietly.
- I can never pick them.
- I can never play with my fingers.
- These are the things that make me totally stuck.
- I can remember to keep my hands quiet on my lap.
- It's not that hard, I can control myself.
- When I stop thinking about my hands, I can concentrate on other things.
1. TIME-OUT
- I ALWAYS try to behave.
- Sometimes when I don't listen, grown-ups send me to a time-out.
- I'm VERY quiet when I'm in a time-out.
- I feel VERY sad and I THINK about what I did wrong.
- I want EVERYONE to think I know how to listen.
- I CAN behave and control myself so I don't get time outs.
- When I listen to grown-ups, everything is great!
2. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I enjoy talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
- They don't always answer when I talk to them.
- Maybe they weren't paying attention or they didn't hear me.
- Maybe they just didn't WANT to talk to me or they were busy.
- I SHOULDN'T try to FORCE people to answer me.
- I can just walk away and forget about it and be happy anyway.
- I'm PROUD of myself when I can just walk away.
3. ASKING ?s YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO
- It's not good to ask questions that I know the answer to.
- People might think I can't remember the answers or that I'm not smart.
- People get bored when you talk about things we already know.
- People might think I'm teasing them & that will make them mad.
- I should only ask questions that I DON'T know the answer to.
- That's what questions are for!
- I'm VERY smart & want to learn new things, so I ONLY ask questions I don't know the
answer to.
4. TOUCHING OTHER'S PROPERTY
- I like to look at other people's things.
- The best way to do this is to ask permission first.
- Nobody likes people who TOUCH their property without asking.
- I don't like it when someone touches MY things without asking first.
- I worry they might break my things if they're not careful.
- When someone asks permission first, I KNOW they'll be careful because they're acting
grown-up.
- Only BABIES grab things without asking first.
- But I'm NOT a baby -- I ALWAYS ask before touching someone's property.
5. CIRCLE TIME
- Circle time is FUN!
- When the teacher talks, I pay close attention.
- The teacher likes it when I ONLY pay attention to her & don't talk to the other
kids.
- I know if I talk to the other kids, I might miss something the teacher said.
- OTHER kids will be upset with me if I ruin circle time.
- When I listen to the teacher, circle time is MUCH more fun!
6. LEAVING ACTIVITY
- I LOVE having friends!
- I have GREAT conversations with the kids I play with.
- I would be hurt if MY friends walked away from ME!
- If I see other kids playing something else, I NEVER walk away from my friends.
- If I did walk away, I'd hurt my friends' feelings.
- They would ALWAYS remember that I walked away & would NEVER want to play with me
again.
- If I stay with my friends they'll always stay with me and be my friends.
7. TUNING IN TO PEOPLE
- I love people MORE than anything else!
- People are VERY interesting.
- I ALWAYS pay careful attention to what people say and do.
- I don't want to miss anything so I always look and listen when people are talking.
- If I stop paying attention, I will miss things.
- When I DON'T pay attention, people have to repeat themselves.
- NOBODY likes to repeat themselves.
- I want to make people happy so I ALWAYS listen and look when people are talking and
doing things.
8. PREDICTING
- I NEVER know what's going to happen later.
- I know it's better to wait and see what will happen instead of trying to guess.
- If I wait, I MAY get a big surprise.
- I'd hate to ruin a good surprise.
- When I try to predict what will happen later people get annoyed with me.
- There's NOTHING better than a big surprise and I know if I DON'T predict I'll get more
surprises!
9. CALLING OUT
- Sometimes I want to talk to someone who's far away.
- When this happens, I NEVER yell across the room.
- It's more polite to just walk over and talk to them.
- Yelling across the room is rude -- it interrupts everyone else.
- I'm GLAD and PROUD that I always walk over to people when I have something to say.
10. NOT LISTENING
- People want to talk to me a lot of the time.
- I ALWAYS stop what I'm doing and look at whoever is talking to me.
- I need to pay attention and hear ALL the important things that grown-ups tell me.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I'll lose all my friends.
- I like when people stop doing stuff when I talk to them.
- So when someone talks to me, I can stop everything & pay attention to them.
11. RULES
- I make sure to follow rules.
- Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
- The rules they make help me learn how to be a better person.
- I make up silly rules and get stuck & that can make a grown-up mad.
- I'll let grown-ups make the rules so I can be great when I grow up.
12. LEAVING OBJECTS WHEN GROWN-UP CALLS
- I like concentrating on what I'm doing.
- Sometimes a grown-up calls me over when I'm busy.
- When this happens, I IMMEDIATELY stop what I'm doing and walk over to them.
- I know if a grown-up calls me when I'm busy, it MUST be something very important.
- If I don't go right away, I can miss something important.
- No one likes children who don't listen.
- When a grown-up calls me, I stop what I'm doing and walk over to them.
- I'm SO glad that I stop what I'm doing to listen.
13. STEPPING ON THINGS
- Sometimes I'm in a hurry when I walk.
- When I'm walking I need to LOOK where I'm going so I don't step on things.
- When I don't look where I'm going, I could trip or bump into things.
- I'm ALWAYS very careful when I walk, even if I'm in a hurry.
14. INTERRUPTING
- Sometimes I see other people talking with each other.
- Sometimes I notice people who are very busy with something.
- When someone is busy or in a conversation with someone I NEVER interrupt.
- It's not polite to interrupt.
- I can tap the person on the shoulder and say excuse me ONLY if what I have to say is
EXTREMELY important.
- Even then I might have to be patient and wait longer.
- People get mad when I interrupt because they can forget what they were going to say.
- NOBODY likes to be interrupted -- I don't like when people interrupt me!
- That's why I don't interrupt people -- I'm sensitive to how other people feel.
15. PERSONAL SPACE
- I love talking to people, and when I do I give them enough space.
- When I talk to people TOO close they get very uncomfortable.
- I don't like it when other people talk too close to MY face!
- My friends like me better when I give them enough space.
- I ALWAYS make sure to give people enough space when I talk to them.
16. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
- I talk to people all the time.
- When I'm in a conversation, I NEVER turn away from whoever I'm talking to.
- If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
- My feelings are hurt when people walk away from me when I'm talking to them.
- When I talk to people and don't look at them, they have trouble hearing me.
- I know if I STAND STILL & LOOK at whoever I'm talking to, I'll have lots of
friends.
17. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- When a grown-up tells me to do something, I listen the FIRST time.
- I shouldn't talk back, I should just listen.
- When I talk, I want other people to listen to me the first time.
- When I listen the first time, grown-ups know that I respect them.
- Babies talk back or don't listen the first time and that's o.k.
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time they're told to do something.
- I ALWAYS listen the first time -- that's what big boys do.
18. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST
- It's important to ALWAYS try hard to do my best.
- I must concentrate on what I'm doing and not be distracted by anything.
- When I do my best, people tell me what a GOOD job I did and I feel proud.
- Lazy people don't do their best -- NO ONE likes lazy people.
- Lazy people finish last -- they miss things and are losers.
- I LOVE to finish first and be a winner!
- I LOVE to do my best and work hard so I'll get the MOST out of EVERYTHING and always
feel happy and proud.
19. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I want to say things very badly and it feels like I have to say it RIGHT that
second.
- It's important to control myself and WAIT until the other person is finished talking.
- People will pay MORE attention to me if I wait my turn.
- When I interrupt, it makes people very mad. I don't like it when someone interrupts ME!
- If I wait patiently, I can STILL tell them later and everyone will like me more.
20. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- I'm very smart so a lot of people want to ask me things.
- I love it when people ask me questions because I know it means they find me
interesting.
- Sometimes when grown-ups ask me things, I don't answer them the first time.
- This makes them think I'm dumb.
- I get frustrated when grown-ups don't answer me the first time.
- The only way anyone will know how smart I am is if I answer their questions as soon as
I hear them.
- Part of being smart is answering questions quickly.
- I want everyone to know how smart I am so I will always answer everyone the first time.
21. PACING
- Some things I do last for a few hours.
- School goes on for a few hours and so do a lot of games and sports I play.
- I like to finish everything I start.
- I'm always good when I start things but sometimes it's hard for me to stay good for a
long time.
- I know if I stay good for a long time I'll get something special.
- The best way to stay good for a long time is to pace myself.
- Pacing means not running too fast or talking too much in the beginning.
- If I pace myself when I start things, I'll probably still be good at the end.
- I want to make you proud of me and I know the best way is to be good for a long time.
22. WEIRD THINGS
- There are a lot of weird things I can do.
- When I stop doing one weird thing I can always think of another.
- The only problem with this is that when I do one weird thing after another, everyone
wants to get away from me.
- If everyone keeps running away from me, I'll be very lonely.
- I would rather be with lots of people than be all alone.
- I better work really hard at controlling all the weird things so I can always have
friends.
23. WAITING YOUR TURN
- I see people waiting on line all the time.
- Sometimes I have to get on line at a store or in school.
- I know that when I'm on line, I have to stay there and not wander off.
- If I don't stay on line in school, other kids will think I have no self-control.
- Their parents won't want me to go to their house or to their birthday parties.
- Parents don't let their children play with children who can't control themselves and
wait on a line.
- If I don't stay on line in a store, my mom and dad won't buy me things I like.
- I always wait on lines patiently wherever I go.
24. MY HANDS
- There are a lot of strange things I can do with my hands.
- When I look around me I notice that almost nobody else does these things but me.
- The people who I notice that do strange things with their hands are all alone.
- Nobody wants to be their friend because of the weird things they do.
- I like having a lot of friends.
- I don't want to be alone.
- I can keep my hands in my lap when I'm sitting and at my side when I'm standing.
1. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I enjoy talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
- They don't ALWAYS answer when I talk to them.
- Maybe they weren't paying attention or they didn't hear me.
- Maybe they just didn't WANT to talk to me or they were busy.
- I SHOULDN'T try to FORCE people to answer me.
- I can just walk away and forget about it and be happy anyway.
- I'm PROUD of myself when I can just walk away.
2. WAITING MY TURN
- I see people waiting on line all the time.
- Sometimes I have to get on line at a store or in school.
- I know that when I'm on line, I have to stay there and not wander off.
- If I don't stay on line in school, other kids will think I have no self- control.
- Their parents won't want me to go to their house or to their birthday parties.
- Parents don't let their children play with children who can't control themselves and
wait on a line.
- If I don't stay on line in a store, my mom and dad won't buy me things I like.
- I always wait on lines patiently wherever I go.
3. NOT LISTENING
- People want to talk to me a lot of the time.
- I ALWAYS stop what I'm doing and look at whoever is talking to me.
- I need to pay attention and hear ALL the important things that grown-ups tell me.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I'll lose all my friends.
- I like when people stop doing stuff when I talk to them.
- So when someone talks to me, I can stop everything & pay attention to them.
4. TOUCHING OTHER PEOPLE OR THEIR THINGS
- I like to look at other people's things.
- The BEST way to do this is to ask permission FIRST.
- Nobody likes people who TOUCH their property without asking.
- I don't like it when someone touches MY things without asking first.
- I worry they might break my things if they're not careful.
- When someone asks permission first, I KNOW they'll be careful because they're acting
grown-up.
- Only BABIES grab things without asking first.
- But I'm NOT a baby -- I ALWAYS ask before touching someone's property.
5. LEAVING ACTIVITY
- I LOVE having friends!
- I have GREAT conversations with the kids I play with.
- I would be hurt if MY friends walked away from ME!
- If I see other kids playing something else, I NEVER walk away from my friends.
- If I did walk away, I'd hurt my friends' feelings.
- They would ALWAYS remember that I walked away & would NEVER want to play with me
again.
- If I stay with my friends they'll always stay with me and be my friends.
6. TIME-OUT
- I ALWAYS try to behave.
- Sometimes when I don't listen, grown-ups send me to a time-out.
- I'm VERY quiet when I'm in a time-out.
- I feel VERY sad and I THINK about what I did wrong.
- I want EVERYONE to think I know how to listen.
- I CAN behave and control myself so I don't get time outs.
- When I listen to grown-ups, everything is great!
7. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- I talk to a lot of people and a lot of people talk to me.
- When I'm in a conversation it's always good to stay in one place.
- When I move back and forth or fidget in my chair it makes people stare at me and stop
paying attention to me.
- I can forget what I was going to say and my friends will walk away from me.
- When I stand and sit still everyone pays attention to me because there are no
distractions.
- I know the best way to keep my friends is to stay still when we're talking.
8. BELL RINGS
- The most important people in my classroom are my teachers.
- They're important because they're the grown-ups who make the rules in school.
- Every school has different rules that children have to follow.
- Sometimes in school, the teacher needs me to stop what I'm doing and pay attention.
- In my old school the rule was that when the lights flashed I had to stop what I was
doing and pay attention to the teachers.
- In my new school, when the teacher rings the bell I have to stop whatever I'm doing and
pay attention.
- Whenever I hear the bell that's exactly what I do because I can earn a star for
following the rules.
9. MY HANDS
- There are a lot of strange things I can do with my hands.
- When I look around me I notice that almost nobody else does these things besides me.
- The people who I notice that DO strange things with their hands are ALL alone.
- Nobody wants to be their friend because of the weird things they do.
- I like having a lot of friends.
- I don't want to be alone.
- I CAN keep my hands in my lap when I'm sitting and at my side when I'm standing.
10. TASK LAZINESS / DOING MY BEST
- It's important to ALWAYS try hard to do my best.
- I must concentrate on what I'm doing and not be distracted by anything.
- When I do my best, people tell me what a GOOD job I did and I feel proud.
- Lazy people don't do their best -- NO ONE likes lazy people.
- Lazy people finish last -- they miss things and are losers.
- I LOVE to finish first and be a winner!
- I LOVE to do my best and work hard so I'll get the MOST out of EVERYTHING and always
feel happy and proud.
11. RULES
- I make sure to follow rules.
- ONLY grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
- The rules they make help me learn how to be a better person.
- I make up silly rules and get stuck & that can make a grown-up mad.
- I'll let grown-ups make the rules so I can be great when I grow up.
12. EARNING STARS
- In my new school the teachers reward good behavior with stars.
- When I follow their rules I know I can earn a star because grown-ups want to give good
things to children who follow their rules.
- One way I can earn a star is to clean up quickly and quietly when I'm finished with
something.
- I can also earn stars by stopping what I'm doing and paying attention to the teachers
when the bell rings.
- Getting stars makes me want to be really good and follow all the rules and listen to
all the grown-ups.
- I know that at the end of the day, I can get lots of good things with my stars.
13. WEIRD THINGS
- There are A LOT of weird things I can do.
- When I stop doing ONE weird thing I can ALWAYS think of another.
- The only problem with this is that when I do one weird thing after another, EVERYONE
wants to get away from me.
- If EVERYONE KEEPS running away from me, I'll be very lonely.
- I would rather be with LOTS of people than be all alone.
- I better work really hard at controlling all the weird things so I can always have
friends.
14. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I want to say things very badly and it feels like I have to say it RIGHT that
second.
- It's important to control myself and WAIT until the other person is finished talking.
- People will pay MORE attention to me if I wait my turn.
- When I interrupt, it makes people very mad. I don't like it when someone interrupts ME!
- If I wait patiently, I can STILL tell them later and everyone will like me more.
15. CALLING OUT
- Sometimes I want to talk to someone who's far away.
- When this happens, I NEVER yell across the room.
- It's more polite to just walk over and talk to them.
- Yelling across the room is rude -- it interrupts everyone else.
- I'm GLAD and PROUD that I always walk over to people when I have something to say.
16. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- When a grown-up tells me to do something, I listen the FIRST time.
- I shouldn't talk back, I should just listen.
- When I talk, I want other people to listen to me the first time.
- When I listen the first time, grown-ups know that I respect them.
- Babies talk back or don't listen the first time and that's o.k.
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time they're told to do something.
- I ALWAYS listen the first time -- that's what big boys do.
17. LOOKING WHERE I'M GOING
- Sometimes I'm in a hurry when I walk.
- When I'm walking I need to LOOK where I'm going so I don't step on things.
- When I don't look where I'm going, I could trip or bump into things.
- Not looking where you're going is dangerous, something can bump into you.
- When I look where I'm going and something is coming at me, I can duck or get out of the
way.
- I'm ALWAYS very careful when I walk, even if I'm in a hurry.
18. PACING
- Some things I do last for a few hours.
- School goes on for a few hours and so do a lot of games and sports I play.
- I like to finish EVERYTHING I start.
- I'm always good when I start things but sometimes it's hard for me to stay good for a
long time.
- I know if I stay good for a long time I'll get something special.
- The best way to stay good for a long time is to pace myself.
- Pacing means not running TOO fast or talking TOO much in the beginning.
- If I pace myself when I start things, I'll probably still be good at the end.
- I want to make you proud of me and me proud of me and I know the best way is to be good
for a LONG time.
19. GROWN-UPS ARE DIFFERENT FROM KIDS
- Sometimes I see a grown-up do things that I'm not allowed to do.
- It's seems unfair but I know it's OK since I realize that grown-ups make the rules, not
kids.
- One day I'm going to be a grown-up and I'll be able to make rules too.
- The only way I'll learn is if I follow grown-ups rules while I'm still a kid.
- When I don't follow a grown-ups rules, they get angry at me and sometimes yell at me.
- I don't like when grown-ups get mad at me.
- I'm a good boy who follows all the rules that grown-ups make.
20. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
- I talk to people all the time.
- When I'm in a conversation, I NEVER turn away from whoever I'm talking to.
- If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
- My feelings are hurt when people walk away from me when I'm talking to them.
- When I talk to people and don't look at them, they have trouble hearing me.
- I know if I STAND STILL & LOOK at whoever I'm talking to, I'll have lots of
friends.
21. DAYDREAMING
- I love people MORE than anything else!
- People are VERY interesting.
- I ALWAYS pay careful attention to what people say and do and NEVER daydream.
- I don't WANT to miss anything so I ALWAYS look AND listen when people are talking.
- If I daydream I STOP paying attention, and I miss things.
- When daydream, people have to repeat themselves.
- NOBODY likes to repeat themselves.
- I want to make people happy so I ALWAYS listen and look when people are talking and
doing things, I never daydream.
22. CIRCLE TIME
- Circle time is FUN!
- When the teacher talks, I pay close attention.
- The teacher likes it when I ONLY pay attention to her & don't talk to the other
kids.
- I know if I talk to the other kids, I might miss something the teacher said.
- OTHER kids will be upset with me if I ruin circle time.
- When I listen to the teacher, circle time is MUCH more fun!
23. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- I'm very smart so a lot of people want to ask me things.
- I love it when people ask me questions because I know it means they find me
interesting.
- Sometimes when grown-ups ask me things, I don't answer them the first time.
- This makes them think I'm dumb.
- I get frustrated when grown-ups don't answer me the first time.
- The only way ANYONE will know how smart I am is if I answer their questions AS SOON AS
I hear them.
- Part of being smart is answering questions quickly.
- I want everyone to know how smart I am so I will ALWAYS answer everyone the first time.
24. DOING THINGS QUICKLY
- When something is really easy to do I should do it quickly instead of stalling.
- When I get distracted and stall, everyone else moves onto the next thing except for me.
- I want to be included in what everyone else is doing.
- If I take to long to finish something I know how to do, everyone will think I don't
want to do the next thing and they'll start without me.
- Even if I yell, "wait for me" nobody will.
- Nobody wants to wait for someone who is slow and takes a long time to move on to the
next thing.
- That's why I try hard to do things quickly. I want to be a part of everything.
1. TIME-OUT
- The BEST way to make grown-ups happy is to behave.
- Sometimes when I misbehave, grown-ups give me time-outs.
- A time-out is a QUIET time to think about what I did wrong.
- I never get mad or hit anybody in a time-out because that would stop me from thinking
about what I did and then I can't learn.
- After a time-out, I've learned how to control myself & I WON'T do the wrong thing
again.
- When I do the wrong behavior again, grown-ups get madder at me and will punish me.
- I CAN behave and control myself so I WON'T NEED to get time-outs.
- I KNOW that good things happen to good boys.
2. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I LOVE to talk to people all the time.
- Sometimes I don't get an answer.
- I don't FORCE people to answer me because I know maybe they're busy or they weren't
paying attention.
- When people don't answer me, I just forget about it and walk away.
3. ASKING ?s YOU KNOW THE ANSWER TO
- Asking questions I know the answer to is NOT necessary.
- When I do THAT, it just wastes everyone's time and gets them upset.
- I should ONLY ask questions if I'm trying to find out something I don't already know.
- I wouldn't want people to ask me question if they knew the answer already.
- There are lots of things I don't know, but WANT to know.
- I can ask questions and find out.
- I'm a big boy -- I don't have to ask questions I know the answers to!
4. TOUCHING OTHER'S PROPERTY
Sometimes I notice things that belong to other people.
- If I want to touch these things, I KNOW I should ask if it's OK first.
- I can only touch it IF they say it's OK, otherwise I better not!
- If someone tells me NOT to, it's because they're afraid I might break it.
- Big boys respect other people's property.
- I'm a big boy and ALWAYS ask permission BEFORE I touch someone's property.
5. CIRCLE TIME
- Circle time is one of my FAVORITE activities at school.
- I follow the teacher's instructions because I don't want to miss anything.
- When I talk to other kids, I might miss something that the teacher is saying.
- When that happens, I might mess up circle time which will make everyone mad at me.
- I wouldn't want someone else to mess up circle time for ME!
- I love circle time so much, that's why I always pay attention to the teacher and never
talk to the other kids.
6. LEAVING ACTIVITY
- I LOVE playing with my friends!
- When I'm playing a game or sport, I stay with my friends the WHOLE time.
- I don't leave them even if something else that's interesting is happening nearby.
- If I did that, I would ruin the game for everyone and nobody would want to play with
me.
- I wouldn't someone to ruin the game for ME!
- Friends are too important to lose, so I'll stick with them the WHOLE time.
7. TUNING IN TO PEOPLE
- I learn a lot by watching and listening to other people, ESPECIALLY other kids.
- When I'm with other people, I pay close attention to what they're saying and doing.
- People LOVE being with someone who pays attention to them.
- If I stop paying attention I might not learn new things.
- I always think about what people say and do so I can learn.
8. PREDICTING
- I love to experience NEW things.
- I never can tell what's going to happen next.
- It's more interesting to wait and see what will happen instead of predicting.
- Surprises are a LOT of fun!
- When I try to guess what will happen next, it gets people mad.
- I'm NOT going to predict anymore because I'd rather have more surprises.
9. CALLING OUT
- Sometimes someone I want to talk to is far away.
- I know it's best to walk across the room to talk to them instead of yelling.
- Only people who don't CARE about other people yell across rooms.
- I care about other people so I'll ALWAYS walk over to people I want to talk to.
10. NOT LISTENING
- People want to talk to me all the time.
- When someone talks to me I stop what I'm doing and pay total attention to them.
- I would not like if someone did not listen to ME!
- Only people who look and listen hear EVERYTHING there is to hear.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I won't HAVE any friends.
- Friends are VERY important, so I always pay attention when people talk to me.
11. RULES
- Grown-ups make rules to help me learn.
- I'm too young to make up rules.
- The rules I make up are ridiculous and make grown-ups mad.
- I'll follow the rules grown-ups make and learn how to be a big boy.
12. LEAVING OBJECTS WHEN GROWN-UP CALLS
- I enjoy getting busy with things.
- Even if I'm busy, when a grown-up calls me, I know it's time to stop what I'm doing and
go to them.
- Boys who aren't good DON'T stop what they're doing and go to grown-ups when they're
called.
- I'm GOOD so when a grown-up calls me, I stop what I'm doing and walk over to them.
13. STEPPING ON THINGS
- Sometimes I have to go someplace in a hurry.
- No matter how much of a hurry I'm in, I know I HAVE to watch where I'm going.
- If I don't look where I'm going I could get hurt.
- I always look where I'm going when I walk or run.
14. INTERRUPTING
- People have lots of conversations with each other.
- When I see people who are busy or in a conversation I let them finish before I talk.
- It's NEVER polite to interrupt -- I don't like when someone interrupts ME!
- If what I have to say is an emergency, I say "excuse me" and tap them on the
shoulder.
- Sometimes a grown-up will tell me to wait anyway and I know I have to listen or they'll
get mad at me.
- I love being a good boy so I NEVER interrupt anyone.
15. PERSONAL SPACE
- I LOVE talking to my friends!
- I NEVER get too close when I'm in a conversation.
- Nobody likes to have someone in their face when they're having a conversation.
- I have LOTS of friends because I always give them their space when I talk to them and
they give me my space when they talk to me!
16. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
- I enjoy having conversations with my friends.
- My friends like me because I don't walk away from them when they're talking to me.
- I would never like it if people walked away from me when I talked.
- I know it would hurt my feelings if they did that.
- So I never walk away from them when they are speaking to me!
- I stand still and pay full attention whenever I'm in a conversation.
- I LOVE practicing to act grown-up so I never walk away from conversations.
17. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- I do what I'm told the first time without talking back.
- When I DON'T listen the first time it's usually because I'm stuck.
- When I get stuck, I can't learn and I frustrate everyone.
- I'm VERY proud of myself when I listen the first time and the grown-ups are proud also.
18. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST
- I always work hard on everything I do.
- I do the BEST job when I try REALLY hard and that makes everyone proud, especially ME!
- When I DON'T work hard and concentrate, I do terrible work & people call me lazy.
- When I work hard I ALWAYS do great work.
- I LOVE doing my best!
19. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I feel like I can't STOP myself from talking!
- When that happens, I give EVERYONE a headache!
- Nobody likes someone who always has to talk.
- I don't like people who are that way!
- I like to only talk when I REALLY have something to say.
20. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- When someone calls my name, I know I better answer them immediately.
- That way they know I'm paying complete attention.
- All kids and grown-ups like it when I pay attention to them.
- When someone calls me and I don't answer the first time they think I'm not friendly.
- I am friendly, so it bothers me when people think I'm not.
- I wouldn't like someone who didn't answer me when I called them.
- I will always answer people the first time so everyone will know how friendly I really
am.
21. PACING
- Sometimes I have to pay attention for a very long time.
- Only a strong person can last a long time at something.
- I know I'm strong but sometimes I forget to pace myself in the beginning and I get
tired later.
- When I'm tired I have a hard time paying attention.
- When I don't pay attention, other kids get asked the fun questions and get to do
interesting things while I end up getting bored.
- I want to do interesting and exciting things all day so I know I have to pace myself.
22. WEIRD THINGS
- Weird things stop me from doing my best.
- When I do something that's weird it gets in the way of everything else.
- When I do weird things I never get to do fun things or play with other kids.
- Playing with other kids and doing fun things is what I like the most.
- It's just not worth it to do weird things anymore.
- I better just control myself so I can do all the things I like.
23. WAITING YOUR TURN
- Good things happen for people who know how to wait their turn.
- When I wait for something I'm always happier when I get it.
- When I don't wait patiently for my turn to come I get the people in front of me very
mad.
- It's not fair to cut in front of someone when it's their turn.
- I've seen a lot of people have fights because they were cut off by someone who didn't
wait their turn.
- I don't like when people want to fight with me.
- I'm going to keep everyone happy especially myself and always wait my turn.
24. MY HANDS
- Look, I'm controlling my hands!
- I know when I control my hands I can concentrate on other things that are much more
important.
- I can read books, play games or have a great conversation with my friends.
- When I think about my hands I can't think about anything else and everyone thinks I'm
strange.
- That makes me sad.
- I'd rather be happy so I keep controlling my hands.
1. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I LOVE to talk to people all the time.
- Sometimes I don't get an answer.
- I don't FORCE people to answer me because I know maybe they're busy or they weren't
paying attention.
- When people don't answer me, I just forget about it and walk away.
2. WAITING MY TURN
- Good things happen for people who know how to wait their turn.
- When I wait for something I'm always happier when I get it.
- When I don't wait patiently for my turn to come I get the people in front of me very
mad.
- It's not fair to cut in front of someone when it's their turn.
- I've seen a lot of people have fights because they were cut off by someone who didn't
wait their turn.
- I don't like when people want to fight with me.
- I'm going to keep everyone happy especially myself and always wait my turn.
3. NOT LISTENING
- People want to talk to me all the time.
- When someone talks to me I stop what I'm doing and pay total attention to them.
- I would not like if someone did not listen to ME!
- Only people who look and listen hear EVERYTHING there is to hear.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I won't HAVE any friends.
- Friends are VERY important, so I always pay attention when people talk to me.
4. TOUCHING OTHER PEOPLE OR THEIR THINGS
- Sometimes I notice things that belong to other people.
- If I want to touch these things, I KNOW I should ask if it's OK first.
- I can only touch it IF they say it's OK, otherwise I better not!
- If someone tells me NOT to, it's because they're afraid I might break it.
- I shouldn't touch other people in a strange way either.
- When you touch other people in a weird way or if you touch their things they get mad.
- Big boys respect other people and their property.
- I'm a big boy and ALWAYS ask permission BEFORE I touch someone's property.
5. LEAVING ACTIVITIES
- I LOVE playing with my friends!
- When I'm playing a game or sport, I stay with my friends the WHOLE time.
- I don't leave them even if something else that's interesting is happening nearby.
- If I did that, I would ruin the game for everyone and nobody would want to play with
me.
- I wouldn't someone to ruin the game for ME!
- Friends are too important to lose, so I'll stick with them the WHOLE time.
6. TIME-OUT
[Parent's note: WE DON'T LIKE USING WORD "BAD", THOUGH I SUPPOSE (with some
embarrassment) WE DID USE IT HERE FOR AT LEAST A WHILE. WE LIKE TO USE "INAPPROPO
BEHAV" OR "NOT GOOD" INSTEAD]
- The BEST way to make grow-ups happy is to behave.
- Sometimes when I misbehave, grown-ups give me time-outs.
- A time-out is a QUIET time to think about what I did wrong.
- I never get mad or hit anybody in a time-out because that would stop me from thinking
about what I did and then I can't learn.
- After a time-out, I've learned how to control myself & I WON'T do the bad thing
again.
- When I do the bad behavior again, grown-ups get madder at me and will punish me.
- I CAN behave and control myself so I WON'T NEED to get time-outs.
- I KNOW that good things happen to good boys.
7. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- I love to talk to people.
- No matter how exciting it is to have a conversation it's best if I sit or stand still
when talking.
- If I keep moving the people I'm talking to will stare at what I'm moving instead of
looking into my eyes.
- When other people don't look into my eyes they can't understand what I'm saying.
- When I sit or stand still people will hear everything I have to say and I like that.
8. BELL RINGS
- In my new school when my teacher wants all the children to stop what they're doing and
pay attention, they ring a bell.
- That reminds me of how they flashed the lights in my old school to get everyone's
attention.
- When I hear the bell ring I stop what I'm doing and look and listen to all of my
teachers.
- That's what all the other children do and I want to be good just like them.
- I know that the teachers are the grown-ups in my class that make the rules so I have to
listen to them.
- That's why whenever I hear the bell ring I pay attention to what the teachers have to
say.
- I love being a good boy.
9. MY HANDS
- LOOK...I'm controlling my hands!
- I know when I control my hands I can concentrate on other things that are much more
important.
- I can read books, play games or have a great conversation with my friends.
- When I think about my hands I can't think about anything else and everyone thinks I'm
strange.
- That makes me VERY sad.
- I'd rather be happy so I keep controlling my hands.
10. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST
- I always work hard on EVERYTHING I do.
- I do the BEST job when I try REALLY hard and that makes everyone proud, especially ME!
- When I DON'T work hard and concentrate, I do terrible work & people call me lazy.
- When I work hard I ALWAYS do great work.
- I LOVE doing my best!
11. RULES
- Grown-ups make rules to help me learn.
- I'm too young to make up rules.
- The rules I make up are ridiculous and make grown-ups mad.
- I'll follow the rules grown-ups make and learn how to be a big boy.
12. EARNING STARS
- I'm so proud of myself when I'm good in school.
- When I listen to the teachers I get stars.
- I know at the end of the day, I can buy candy and stickers with my stars and that makes
me happy.
- Another great thing about getting stars is I can tell mommy and daddy how good I was by
showing them the candy and stickers I got with my stars.
- I like to put the stickers on my shirt and give the candy to [Brother].
- I know if I'm really good I can get lots of stars.
- If I get a lot of stars I can get a lot of candy for [Brother] and a lot = of stickers
for me.
- When I get a lot of stickers and candy I make everyone happy, especially me.
13. WEIRD THINGS
- Weird things stop me from doing my best.
- When I do something that's weird it gets in the way of everything else.
- When I do weird things I never get to do fun things or play with other kids.
- Playing with other kids and doing fun things is what I like the most.
- It's just not worth it to do weird things anymore.
- I better just control myself so I can do all the things I like.
14. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I feel like I can't STOP myself from talking!
- When that happens, I give EVERYONE a headache!
- Nobody likes someone who always has to talk.
- I don't like people who are that way!
- I like to only talk when I REALLY have something to say.
15. CALLING OUT
- Sometimes someone I want to talk to is far away.
- I know it's best to walk across the room to talk to them instead of yelling.
- Only people who don't CARE about other people yell across rooms.
- I care about other people so I'll ALWAYS walk over to people I want to talk to.
16. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- I do what I'm told the FIRST time WITHOUT talking back.
- When I DON'T listen the first time it's usually because I'm stuck.
- When I get stuck, I can't learn and I frustrate EVERYONE!
- I'm VERY proud of myself when I listen the first time and the grown-ups are proud also.
17. LOOKING WHERE I'M GOING
- Sometimes I want to go someplace in a hurry.
- No matter how much of a hurry I'm in, I know I HAVE to watch where I'm going.
- If I don't look where I'm going I could get hurt or something could knock into me.
- That's dangerous, and I wouldn't know if I should duck or get out of the way if I'm not
looking.
- I always look where I'm going when I walk or run.
18. PACING
- Sometimes I have to pay attention for a very long time.
- Only a strong person can last a long time at something.
- I know I'm strong but sometimes I forget to pace myself in the beginning and I get
tired later.
- When I'm tired I have a hard time paying attention.
- When I don't pay attention, other kids get asked the fun questions and get to do
interesting things while I end up getting bored.
- I want to do interesting and exciting things all day so I know I have to pace myself.
19. GROWN-UPS ARE DIFFERENT FROM KIDS
- When a grown-up tells me to do something I better listen.
- They make the rules for the grown-ups and the kids.
- I have to have respect for what they say since they're older and know better than I do.
- The rules they make up are for my own good.
- I don't know how to make up good rules yet so I better pay attention to the grown-ups
rules so I can learn.
- Someday I'm going to be a grown-up but since I'm still a kid I can't make up any rules
yet.
- I can learn by paying attention to all the grown-ups rules.
20. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
- I enjoy having conversations with my friends.
- My friends like me because I don't walk away from them when they're talking to me.
- I would NEVER like it if people walked away from me when I talked.
- I know it would hurt my feelings if they did THAT.
- So I NEVER walk away from them when they are speaking to me!
- I stand still and pay FULL attention whenever I'm in a conversation.
- I LOVE practicing to act grown-up so I never walk away from conversations.
21. DAYDREAMING
- I learn a lot by watching and listening to other people, ESPECIALLY other kids.
- When I'm with other people, I pay close attention to what they're saying and doing.
- People LOVE being with someone who pays attention to them.
- If I stop paying attention I might not learn new things.
- When I daydream, I can't pay attention.
- I always think about what people say and do so I can learn.
22. CIRCLE TIME
- Circle time is one of my FAVORITE activities at school.
- I follow the teacher's instructions because I don't want to miss anything.
- When I talk to other kids, I might miss something that the teacher is saying.
- When that happens, I might mess up circle time which will make everyone mad at me.
- I wouldn't want someone else to mess up circle time for ME!
- I love circle time so much, that's why I always pay attention to the teacher and never
talk to the other kids.
23. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- When someone calls my name, I know I BETTER answer them IMMEDIATELY!
- That way they know I'm paying COMPLETE attention.
- All kids and grown-ups like it when I pay attention to them.
- When someone calls me and I don't answer the first time they think I'm not friendly.
- I am friendly, so it bothers me when people think I'm not.
- I wouldn't like someone who didn't answer ME when I called THEM!
- I will ALWAYS answer people the first time so EVERYONE will know how friendly I REALLY
am.
24. DOING THINGS QUICKLY
- Sometimes I have to finish one thing before I move on to another.
- If I stall or dawdle, I won't finish what I'm doing and it will take me a long time to
get started on the next thing.
- If I'm not quick, other kids will move on to other things without me.
- I don't want to get left behind.
- I want to be part of the group and have lots of friends.
- I know I can do things quickly and still do a good job.
- If I do things quickly, I will always be part of whatever's happening right from the
start.
1. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I like talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
- Sometimes they don't answer when I talk to them.
- Maybe they didn't hear me or maybe they weren't paying attention.
- Maybe they were busy or maybe they just didn't want to talk to me.
- It's not my job to make people answer me.
- I can just forget about it, maybe they'll talk to me later.
- That's what I see the other kids do.
2. TEACHER TALKS
- When I'm in school, I know that the teacher is in charge.
- The teacher makes all the rules for the classroom.
- The teacher also makes sure that all the children obey the classroom rules.
- That's why when the teacher talks, I always stop what I'm doing and listen RIGHT AWAY.
- When the teacher says something, all the other children listen immediately.
- I know, because I watch the other children and I see them always listen when the
teacher talks.
- Whenever a teacher says to do something, I do exactly what the other children do.
- I don't wait for the teacher to repeat herself, I listen the first time.
- If a teacher has to tell me something twice, I know I'll make her mad.
- I'm a good boy in school, I follow the teacher's directions just like I see the other
kids do.
3. NOT LISTENING
- When people talk to me, it's usually something I need to hear.
- It's important to look at people & stop what I'm doing when they have something to
tell me.
- Sometimes grown-ups tell me VERY important things that I need to know.
- If I don't look & listen I might miss something important and make someone mad.
- All the other kids look and listen when people talk to them.
- I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when grown-ups want me to listen.
- When people talk to me, I will STOP what I'm doing and look & listen to them.
4. LEAVING ACTIVITY
- I LOVE playing with other kids.
- I talk to the kids I'm playing with and I notice that the other kids do the same thing.
- If I talk to kids playing other games, MY friends will be sad and think I'm ignoring
them.
- They'll think I don't like them.
- They might not want to play with me next time.
- If I ONLY talk to my friends we'll have fun together
- Next time they'll play with me again.
5. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- It's important to sit still when I'm sitting and stand still when I'm standing.
- When I sit, my hands should be in my lap and my feet in front of me.
- When I don't sit or stand still I get distracted and have trouble following what's
going on.
- The other problem is that everyone else gets distracted too since they start staring at
the way I'm moving and forget to listen to me.
- I hate when people don't listen to me and I know I can get them to listen to me by
staying in one place.
- Even though I get excited when I talk to people, I can control myself and stay still.
- When I look around me I notice that all the other kids know how to sit and stand still.
- I want to be like them, this way I'll have more friends pay attention to me.
6. TASK LAZINESS / DOING MY BEST
- It's SO important to do my best in EVERYTHING I do.
- Sometimes I'm given something too easy to do.
- That doesn't matter, I'm still going to do my best and show everyone how smart I am.
- I need to make everything I do as good as it can possibly be.
- When I do my best I'm REALLY proud of myself & others say good things about my
work.
- When I DON'T do my best it's because I'm being lazy.
- Lazy people finish things last, miss out on things and lose games.
- I don't want to finish last because when I look around me at the other kids I see how
proud they are when they try their best.
- NOBODY'S proud of me when I don't try hard.
- I'll always try to do my best and work HARD so I'll get the most out of everything.
- That will make ME very happy.
7. RULES
- Rules are important for EVERYONE.
- I'm not allowed to make up rules.
- Only grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
- Children don't know how to make up rules -- they make up silly rules.
- I can learn A LOT from the rules grown-ups make.
- If I make up rules, grown-ups will be upset with me.
- They'll think I'm trying to boss them around.
- I won't make up rules because that's a grown-ups job.
8. WEIRD THINGS
- All the strange things I do are NOT a good idea.
- People stare at me and laugh AT me (and not WITH ME) when I act weird.
- I get stuck on these things whether its my hands, my feet, my mouth or my eyes.
- Sometimes when grown-ups tell me to stop doing a weird thing, I think of ANOTHER weird
thing I can do instead.
- Instead of thinking about OTHER weird things to do, I SHOULD think of ways to be good.
- None of my best friends do weird things and I want to be just like them.
- When I'm GOOD I can get lots of good things.
- It's hard, but I CAN do it.
9. BULLYING
- Sometimes I see another kid doing something that they're not supposed to.
- When that happens I know that I should tell a grown-up but sometimes I forget and yell
at them.
- This makes the other kid very upset and can make him cry.
- When that happens I know that I made a mistake and I better back off and let him have
his space.
- The last thing I should do is keep yelling at him or I might lose a friend.
- I'm better off saying I'm sorry so I can keep a friend.
- It's not funny when I made someone cry because people might think I'm mean.
- I'm not a bully; I'm a nice boy who doesn't want to hurt anyone else's feelings.
10. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I want to say things VERY badly.
- It feels like I HAVE to say it RIGHT THAT SECOND.
- It's important to wait until the other person is finished talking.
- Even though it FEELS important, it CAN wait.
- They will listen to me BETTER if I wait patiently.
- When I interrupt, it just ANGERS people.
- People wonder, "what's wrong with him?" and "why can't he wait?"
- If I can wait, I can STILL tell them later and EVERYONE will like me MORE.
11. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- It's IMPORTANT to listen to grown-ups the first time.
- I don't know when I'm getting stuck, but grown-ups always KNOW when I am.
- I can't always talk about myself.
- The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for a second.
- A grown-up shouldn't have to tell me something more than once.
- When I listen the first time, grown-ups are proud of me and I'M proud of myself.
- If I don't listen, grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't know HOW to listen.
- My friends will also think I'm a baby because they're not babies and they listen the
first time.
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time.
- I'm a big boy because I ALWAYS listen the first time.
- Nobody ever has to ask me something more than once because I listen quickly.
12. LOOKING WHERE I'M GOING
- When I'm walking someplace I need to look EVERYWHERE in front of me.
- That's important for EVERYONE'S safety.
- If I DON'T look, I might step on something and break it.
- Something might come crashing into me and hurt me bad.
- I might trip and hurt myself.
- I might bump into someone or something.
- I don't like breaking things or getting hurt so I'll always look where I'm going just
like all the other kids.
- When I look, I can get out of the way if something dangerous is coming at me.
- I'm SO proud when I remember to watch where I'm going.
13. PACING
- Sometimes I do things for a VERY long time.
- I know from watching other kids that I have to save up my energy so I don't get tired
later.
- I always have to pace myself and NOT get TOO wild or I will get tired and have trouble
paying attention later.
- If I have trouble paying attention, my friends will think I'm ignoring them and they
will look for other people to play with.
- If I stay calm and pace myself, I'll be able to do great for a VERY long time and I'll
fit in great in my class.
14. GROWN UPS ARE DIFFERENT FROM KIDS
- Grown-ups are in charge and make the rules and decide things.
- Grown-ups have different sets of rules than kids.
- They make up the rules for grown-ups and kids.
- I never see kids making up rules for anyone.
- It seems unfair since kids can't do all the things that grown-ups can.
- It's important to respect what grown-ups say and do, they know best.
- I can learn a lot from grown-ups especially if I follow their rules.
15. WALKING FROM CONVERSATION
- I LOVE to hear what other people have to say.
- I NEVER turn away from anyone when I'm in a conversation.
- Looking at people is a VERY important part of talking to them.
- If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
- They will think I don't care about them.
- It's impossible to understand what someone is saying when you're not looking at them.
- People like me better when I look at them, it makes them WANT to talk to me.
- I promise to stay still and look at everyone who talks to me.
- I'm want to be a good friend and I'm PROUD to be a good friend.
16. DAYDREAMING
- I LOVE hearing what other people say and WATCHING what other kids & people do.
- When I'm with other people, I pay attention and ONLY think about what they are saying
or doing.
- When I remember to do this, I'm proud to make friends and know what's going on.
- If I daydream and think about other things, I can get distracted and might even get
stuck.
- People will think I'm weird and won't want to play with me.
- I never daydream and ALWAYS think about what people are saying and doing.
17. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- People ask me things ALL the time.
- I KNOW when someone asks me something it's because they want me to answer.
- When I DON'T answer, grown-ups and other kids might think I don't like them.
- When I don't answer people have to repeat themselves and that makes them mad.
- Nobody should have to ask a question more than once.
- All the other kids answer questions the first time.
- I hate when people don't answer MY questions so I KNOW how THEY must feel when I don't
answer them.
- I know I have important things to say and that's why people ask me things.
- I will ALWAYS answer EVERYONE the FIRST time so I can have lots of friends.
18. DOING THINGS QUICKLY
- Part of pacing yourself is learning to do things quickly.
- Dawdling and stalling isn't good because you can finish things last.
- When I finish last, I miss out on playing games with other kids.
- If I take to long to join an activity I might miss something.
- I'll have less time to play with other kids.
- I want to be part of the group and be part of the action.
- When I see the other kids are going faster than me I know it's because they want to be
ready for what comes next.
- I won't stall, I'll do things quickly and always finish up.
1. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I enjoy talking to people, ESPECIALLY other children.
- They don't ALWAYS answer when I talk to them.
- Maybe they weren't paying attention or they didn't hear me.
- Maybe they just didn't WANT to talk to me or they were busy.
- I SHOULDN'T try to FORCE people to answer me.
- I can just walk away and forget about it and be happy anyway.
- I'm PROUD of myself when I can just walk away.
2. TEACHER TALKS
- I love to watch the other children in my class because I learn from them.
- One thing I noticed is that whenever the teacher talks, all the other children follow
her directions the FIRST TIME.
- Our teacher doesn't have to tell anyone anything twice.
- She's in charge and everyone respects her and listens the FIRST TIME.
- They know and so do I, that the teacher makes all the rules for the class.
- That's why it's so important to follow the teacher's direction's just like everyone
else.
3. NOT LISTENING
- People want to talk to me a lot of the time.
- I ALWAYS stop what I'm doing and look at whoever is talking to me.
- I need to pay attention and hear ALL the important things that grown-ups tell me.
- When someone talks to me, I better listen the first time.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I'll lose all my friends.
- My friends listen to other people and they want me to be the same way.
- I like when people stop doing stuff when I talk to them.
- So when someone talks to me, I can stop everything immediately & pay attention to
them.
4. LEAVING ACTIVITY
- I LOVE having friends!
- I have GREAT conversations with the kids I play with.
- I would be hurt if MY friends walked away from ME!
- If I see other kids playing something else, I NEVER walk away from my friends.
- If I did walk away, I'd hurt my friends' feelings.
- They would ALWAYS remember that I walked away & would NEVER want to play with me
again.
- If I stay with my friends they'll always stay with me and be my friends.
5. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- I talk to a lot of people and a lot of people talk to me.
- When I'm in a conversation it's always good to stay in one place.
- When I move back and forth or fidget in my chair it makes people stare at me and stop
paying attention to me.
- In my chair I should keep my hands in my lap and my feet in front of me.
- I can forget what I was going to say and my friends will walk away from me.
- All my friends know how to sit and stand still.
- When I stand and sit still everyone pays attention to me because there are no
distractions.
- I know the best way to keep my friends is to stay still when we're talking.
6. TASK LAZINESS / DOING MY BEST
- It's important to ALWAYS try hard to do my best.
- Even if something is easy I need to do my best and show everyone how smart I am.
- If it's too easy, I can always tell a grown-up that I need something harder to do.
- I must concentrate on what I'm doing and not be distracted by anything.
- When I do my best, people tell me what a GOOD job I did and I feel proud.
- Lazy people don't do their best -- NO ONE likes lazy people.
- Lazy people finish last -- they miss things and are losers.
- I LOVE to finish first and be a winner!
- I LOVE to do my best and work hard so I'll get the MOST out of EVERYTHING and always
feel happy and proud.
7. RULES
- I make sure to follow rules.
- ONLY grown-ups I know can make up rules for me.
- The rules they make help me learn how to be a better person.
- I make up silly rules and get stuck & that can make a grown-up mad.
- My friends don't make rules either, they're really cool.
- I'll let grown-ups make the rules so I can be great when I grow up.
8. WEIRD THINGS
- There are A LOT of weird things I can do.
- When I stop doing ONE weird thing I can ALWAYS think of another.
- The only problem with this is that when I do one weird thing after another, EVERYONE
wants to get away from me.
- If EVERYONE KEEPS running away from me, I'll be very lonely.
- I look at a lot of popular kids and I notice they don't do weird things.
- Popular kids have lots of friends.
- I would rather be with LOTS of people than be all alone.
- I better work really hard at controlling all the weird things so I can always have
friends.
9. BULLYING
- When I see someone playing with something that's mine I know I should let them.
- It's not a good idea to fight with someone when they're playing with my things.
- If I share, I know grown-ups will know that I'm a big boy.
- It's really nice to share because it gives other kids a chance to enjoy my toys.
- That makes other kids happy which makes me happy.
- If someone is playing with something that's mine I just back off and let them play.
- If I yell and don't back off, then other kids will think I'm a bully.
- I don't want that, I want kids to like me so I always give them a chance if they want
to play with my things.
10. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I want to say things very badly and it feels like I have to say it RIGHT that
second.
- It's important to control myself and WAIT until the other person is finished talking.
- People will pay MORE attention to me if I wait my turn.
- When I interrupt, it makes people very mad. I don't like it when someone interrupts ME!
- If I wait patiently, I can STILL tell them later and everyone will like me more.
11. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- When a grown-up tells me to do something, I listen the FIRST time.
- Nobody should ever have to tell someone something more than once.
- When I talk, I want other people to listen to me the first time also.
- When I listen the first time, grown-ups know that I respect them.
- Babies talk back or don't listen the first time and that's o.k.
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time they're told to do something.
- I know this because I notice other kids listening.
- I ALWAYS listen the first time -- that's what big boys do.
12. LOOKING WHERE I'M GOING
- Sometimes I'm in a hurry when I walk.
- When I'm walking I need to LOOK where I'm going so I don't step on things.
- When I don't look where I'm going, I could trip or bump into things.
- Not looking where you're going is dangerous; something can bump into you.
- When I look where I'm going and something is coming at me, I can duck or get out of the
way.
- I'm ALWAYS very careful when I walk, even if I'm in a hurry.
13. PACING
- Some things I do last for a few hours.
- School goes on for a few hours and so do a lot of games and sports I play.
- I like to finish EVERYTHING I start.
- I'm always good when I start things but sometimes it's hard for me to stay good for a
long time.
- I know if I stay good for a long time I'll get something special.
- The best way to stay good for a long time is to pace myself.
- Pacing means not running TOO fast or talking TOO much in the beginning.
- If I pace myself when I start things, I'll probably still be good at the end.
- I want to make you proud of me and me proud of me and I know the best way is to be good
for a LONG time.
14. GROWN-UPS ARE DIFFERENT FROM KIDS
- Sometimes I see a grown-up do things that I'm not allowed to do.
- It's seems unfair but I know it's OK since I realize that grown-ups make the rules, not
kids.
- One day I'm going to be a grown-up and I'll be able to make rules too.
- The only way I'll learn is if I follow grown-ups rules while I'm still a kid.
- When I don't follow a grown-ups rules, they get angry at me and sometimes yell at me.
[we TRIED not to lose it....]
- I don't like when grown-ups get mad at me.
- I'm a good boy who follows all the rules that grown-ups make.
15. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
- I talk to people all the time.
- When I'm in a conversation, I NEVER turn away from whoever I'm talking to.
- If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
- My feelings are hurt when people walk away from me when I'm talking to them.
- When I talk to people and don't look at them, they have trouble hearing me.
- I know if I STAND STILL & LOOK at whoever I'm talking to, I'll have lots of
friends.
16. DAYDREAMING
- I love people MORE than anything else!
- People are VERY interesting.
- I ALWAYS pay careful attention to what people say and do and NEVER daydream.
- I don't WANT to miss anything so I ALWAYS look AND listen when people are talking.
- If I daydream I STOP paying attention, and I miss things.
- When daydream, people have to repeat themselves.
- NOBODY likes to repeat themselves.
- I want to make people happy so I ALWAYS listen and look when people are talking and
doing things, I never daydream.
17. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- I'm very smart so a lot of people want to ask me things.
- I love it when people ask me questions because I know it means they find me
interesting.
- Sometimes when grown-ups ask me things, I don't answer them the first time.
- This makes them think I'm dumb.
- They have to ask me over and over and that gets them frustrated.
- I know because I get frustrated when grown-ups don't answer me the first time.
- The only way ANYONE will know how smart I am is if I answer their questions AS SOON AS
I hear them.
- Part of being smart is answering questions quickly.
- I want everyone to know how smart I am so I will ALWAYS answer everyone the first time.
18. DOING THINGS QUICKLY
- When something is really easy to do I should do it quickly instead of stalling.
- When I get distracted and stall, everyone else moves onto the next thing except for me.
- I want to be included in what everyone else is doing.
- If I take to long to finish something I know how to do, everyone will think I don't
want to do the next thing and they'll start without me.
- Even if I yell "wait for me", nobody will.
- Nobody wants to wait for someone who is slow and takes a long time to move on to the
next thing.
- That's why I try hard to do things quickly. I want to be a part of everything.
19. PERSONAL SPACE
- I love talking to people, and when I do I give them enough space.
- When I talk to people TOO close they get very uncomfortable.
- I don't like it when other people talk too close to MY face!
- My friends like me better when I give them enough space.
- I ALWAYS make sure to give people enough space when I talk to them.
1. NO ANSWER FROM OTHERS
- I LOVE to talk to people all the time.
- Sometimes I don't get an answer.
- I don't FORCE people to answer me because I know maybe they're busy or they weren't
paying attention.
- When people don't answer me, I just forget about it and walk away.
2. TEACHER TALKS
- Sometimes when I'm in school, the teacher gives the classroom instructions on how to do
things.
- When I look around me I notice that all the kids are paying attention to the teacher's
words.
- All the kids follow the teacher's instructions because, like me, they know that when a
teacher talks they have to listen the first time.
- Teachers are very smart and they know how to do a lot of things better than I can.
- I can learn a lot from teachers so I always pay attention when they talk.
- If I don't listen the first time I might miss something and fall behind the rest of the
class.
- I love fitting in with the rest of my class so I listen to the teacher and follow her
directions, just like the rest of the kids. [
and of course when he found out the
OTHER kids really DON'T listen, he used it against us and they we use their example, and
how THEY'RE always getting into trouble to convince him to be a good boy and how proud of
himself he could be then if he's better than that]
3. NOT LISTENING
- People want to talk to me all the time.
- When someone talks to me I stop what I'm doing and pay total attention to them.
- I would not like if someone did not listen to ME!
- Only people who look and listen hear EVERYTHING there is to hear.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I won't HAVE any friends.
- Friends are VERY important, so I always pay attention when people talk to me.
4. LEAVING ACTIVITIES
- I LOVE playing with my friends!
- When I'm playing a game or sport, I stay with my friends the WHOLE time.
- I don't leave them even if something else that's interesting is happening nearby.
- If I did that, I would ruin the game for everyone and nobody would want to play with
me.
- I wouldn't someone to ruin the game for ME!
- Friends are too important to lose, so I'll stick with them the WHOLE time.
5. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- I love to talk to people.
- No matter how exciting it is to have a conversation it's best if I sit or stand still
when talking.
- If I keep moving the people I'm talking to will stare at what I'm moving instead of
looking into my eyes.
- When other people don't look into my eyes they can't understand what I'm saying.
- When I sit or stand still people will hear everything I have to say and I like that.
6. TASK LAZINESS / DOING BEST
- I always work hard on EVERYTHING I do even if it's something that I can do easily.
- If something is too easy, I can always tell a grown-up that I need something harder to
do to make it more interesting.
- I do the BEST job when I try REALLY hard and that makes everyone proud...especially ME!
- When I DON'T work hard and concentrate, I do terrible work & people call me lazy.
- When I work hard I ALWAYS do great work.
- I LOVE doing my best!
7. RULES
- Grown-ups make rules to help me learn.
- I'm too young to make up rules.
- The rules I make up are ridiculous and make grown-ups mad.
- I'll follow the rules grown-ups make and learn how to be a big boy.
8. WEIRD THINGS
- Weird things stop me from doing my best.
- When I do something that's weird it gets in the way of everything else.
- When I do weird things I never get to do fun things or play with other kids.
- Playing with other kids and doing fun things is what I like the most.
- It's just not worth it to do weird things anymore.
- I'd better just control myself so I can do all the things I like.
9. BULLYING
- When I yell at my brother or another kid that makes them upset.
- I really don't want to upset other kids and make them cry because it makes me sad to
see other people sad.
- It's even worse if I smile or laugh at people who are crying.
- It's better to be really nice to someone who's crying or sad, especially if I made them
sad.
- I'm going to try to stay out of fights with my brother and other kids.
10. I MUST TALK
- Sometimes I feel like I can't STOP myself from talking!
- When that happens, I give EVERYONE a headache!
- Nobody likes someone who always has to talk.
- I don't like people who are that way!
- I like to only talk when I REALLY have something to say.
11. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- I do what I'm told the FIRST time.
- I know that nobody should have to repeat themselves because I didn't listen the first
time.
- When I DON'T listen the first time it's usually because I'm stuck.
- When I get stuck, I can't learn and I frustrate EVERYONE!
- I'm VERY proud of myself when I listen the first time and the grown-ups are proud also.
12. LOOKING WHERE I'M GOING
- Sometimes I want to go someplace in a hurry.
- No matter how much of a hurry I'm in, I know I HAVE to watch where I'm going.
- If I don't look where I'm going I could get hurt or something could knock into me.
- That's dangerous, and I wouldn't know if I should duck or get out of the way if I'm not
looking.
- I always look where I'm going when I walk or run.
13. PACING
- Sometimes I have to pay attention for a very long time.
- Only a strong person can last a long time at something.
- I know I'm strong but sometimes I forget to pace myself in the beginning and I get
tired later.
- When I'm tired I have a hard time paying attention.
- When I don't pay attention, other kids get asked the fun questions and get to do
interesting things while I end up getting bored.
- I want to do interesting and exciting things all day so I know I have to pace myself.
14. GROWN-UPS ARE DIFFERENT FROM KIDS
- When a grown-up tells me to do something I better listen.
- They make the rules for the grown-ups and the kids.
- I have to have respect for what they say since they're older and know better than I do.
- The rules they make up are for my own good.
- I don't know how to make up good rules yet so I better pay attention to the grown-ups
rules so I can learn.
- Someday I'm going to be a grown-up but since I'm still a kid I can't make up any rules
yet.
- I can learn by paying attention to all the grown-ups rules.
15. WALKING AWAY FROM CONVERSATION
- I enjoy having conversations with my friends.
- My friends like me because I don't walk away from them when they're talking to me.
- I would NEVER like it if people walked away from me when I talked.
- I know it would hurt my feelings if they did THAT.
- So I NEVER walk away from them when they are speaking to me!
- I stand still and pay FULL attention whenever I'm in a conversation.
- I LOVE practicing to act grown-up so I never walk away from conversations.
16. DAYDREAMING
- I learn a lot by watching and listening to other people, ESPECIALLY other kids.
- When I'm with other people, I pay close attention to what they're saying and doing.
- People LOVE being with someone who pays attention to them.
- If I stop paying attention I might not learn new things.
- When I daydream, I can't pay attention.
- I always think about what people say and do so I can learn.
17. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- When someone calls my name, I know I BETTER answer them IMMEDIATELY!
- That way they know I'm paying COMPLETE attention.
- All kids and grown-ups like it when I pay attention to them.
- When someone calls me and I don't answer the first time they think I'm not friendly.
- I am friendly, so it bothers me when people think I'm not.
- I wouldn't like someone who didn't answer ME when I called THEM!
- I will ALWAYS answer people the first time so EVERYONE will know how friendly I REALLY
am.
18. DOING THINGS QUICKLY
- Sometimes I have to finish one thing before I move on to another.
- If I stall or dawdle, I won't finish what I'm doing and it will take me a long time to
get started on the next thing.
- If I'm not quick, other kids will move on to other things without me.
- I don't want to get left behind.
- I want to be part of the group and have lots of friends.
- I know I can do things quickly and still do a good job.
- If I do things quickly, I will always be part of whatever's happening right from the
start.
19. PERSONAL SPACE
- I LOVE talking to my friends!
- I NEVER get too close when I'm in a conversation.
- Nobody likes to have someone in their face when they're having a conversation.
- I have LOTS of friends because I always give them their space when I talk to them and
they give me my space when they talk to me!
1. FOLLOWING THE GROUP
- When the kids in school are listening to the teacher or a tape as a group, I MUST
listen carefully also.
- I need to hear ALL the words the teacher or tape tells the group of kids because I'm
part of the group too.
- I have to watch the other children carefully to see what they do so I'll do the right
thing also.
- Instructions are always important to follow correctly that's why I pay attention to all
instructions given to the group.
2. TEACHER TALKS
- When I'm in school, I know that the teacher is in charge
- The teacher makes all the rules for the classroom.
- The teacher also makes sure that all the children obey the classroom rules.
- That's why when the teacher talks, I always stop what I'm doing and listen RIGHT AWAY.
- When the teacher says something, all the other children listen IMMEDIATELY.
- I know, because I watch the other children and I see them always listen when the
teacher talks. [Again, he of course found out how untrue this was and then we proceeded to
use THAT to DRO HIS good job]
- Whenever a teacher says to do something, I do exactly what the other children do.
- I don't wait for the teacher to repeat herself, I listen the first time.
- If a teacher has to tell me something twice, I know I'll make her mad.
- I'm a good boy in school, I follow the teacher's directions just like I see the other
kids do.
3. NOT LISTENING
- When people talk to me, it's usually something I need to hear.
- It's important to look at people & stop what I'm doing when they have something to
tell me.
- Sometimes grown-ups tell me VERY important things that I need to know.
- If I don't look & listen I might miss something important and make someone mad.
- All the other kids look and listen when people talk to them.
- I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when grown-ups want me to listen.
- When people talk to me, I will STOP what I'm doing and look & listen to them.
4. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- It's important to sit still when I'm sitting and stand still when I'm standing.
- When I sit, my hands should be in my lap and my feet in front of me.
- When I don't sit or stand still I get distracted and have trouble following what's
going on.
- The other problem is that everyone else gets distracted too since they start staring at
the way I'm moving and forget to listen to me.
- I hate when people don't listen to me and I know I can get them to listen to me by
staying in one place.
- Even though I get excited when I talk to people, I can control myself and stay still.
- When I look around me I notice that all the other kids know how to sit and stand still.
- I want to be like them, this way I'll have more friends pay attention to me.
5. BULLYING
- Sometimes I see another kid doing something that they're not supposed to.
- When that happens I know that I should tell a grown-up but sometimes I forget and yell
at them.
- This makes the other kid very upset and can make him cry.
- When that happens I know that I made a mistake and I better back off and let him have
his space.
- The last thing I should do is keep yelling at him or I might lose a friend.
- I'm better off saying I'm sorry so I can keep a friend.
- It's not funny when I made someone cry because people might think I'm mean.
- I'm not a bully, I'm a nice boy who doesn't want to hurt anyone else's feelings.
6. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- It's IMPORTANT to listen to grown-ups the first time.
- I don't know when I'm getting stuck, but grown-ups always KNOW when I am.
- I can't always talk about myself.
- The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for a second.
- A grown-up shouldn't have to tell me something more than once.
- When I listen the first time, grown-ups are proud of me and I'M proud of myself.
- If I don't listen, grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't know HOW to listen.
- My friends will also think I'm a baby because they're not babies and they listen the
first time.
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time.
- I'm a big boy because I ALWAYS listen the first time.
- Nobody ever has to ask me something more than once because I listen quickly.
7. LOOKING AT PEOPLE
- When people call my name it is important to look at them right away
- Calling me "[name]" is the only way they can get only my attention.
- It means they have something special to say to me.
- Sometimes people call me when I'm in the middle of playing or watching TV.
- I want people to think I'm listening to them so they'll want to be my friend.
- I want to have good friends.
- I'll try to be good and look at people when they call my name.
8. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- People ask me things ALL the time.
- I KNOW when someone asks me something it's because they want me to answer.
- When I DON'T answer, grown-ups and other kids might think I don't like them.
- When I don't answer people have to repeat themselves and that makes them mad.
- Nobody should have to ask a question more than once.
- All the other kids answer questions the first time.
- I hate when people don't answer MY questions so I KNOW how THEY must feel when I don't
answer them.
- I know I have important things to say and that's why people ask me things.
- I will ALWAYS answer EVERYONE the FIRST time so I can have lots of friends.
9. WATCHING OTHER KIDS
- I spend a lot of my day with other kids.
- When I'm with other kids I pay close attention to everything they do because I can
learn a lot from them.
- The other kids like to spend time with me too.
- Kids should always work together and play together and watch each other closely.
- The reason I have so many friends is that I'm very interested in what they do.
- That's because I always watch them.
10. NO HITTING - LISTENING TO TEACHERS
- It's never OK to hit people.
- Hitting people is very disrespectful and it shows that I don't care enough about other
people.
- Hitting shows that I'm not thinking about others' feelings.
- Other people will think that I am mean if I hit or push.
- Adults and teachers will tell me that this is VERY wrong and mean!
- I cannot argue with them because this is EXTREMELY SERIOUS.
- Teachers and grown-ups are protecting the other children from someone who is acting
mean.
- I must ALWAYS listen to adults and teachers about hitting and pushing.
- Even when someone hits or pushes me first, it's not OK to hit or push back.
- I must tell the teachers or grown-ups about it instead.
- This is the MOST IMPORTANT think to remember about how to treat others.
- I MUST NEVER HIT OR PUSH ANYONE!
1. FOLLOWING THE GROUP
- One of the things I love about school is when the teacher puts on a tape with songs and
dance instructions.
- I listen very carefully to the WORDS on the tape that tell me what to do and how to
dance.
- These words are called instructions
- The teacher also gives the group instructions.
- I really listen to instructions and I watch the other kids to make sure I'm following
all the directions.
- Following instructions makes me feel like an important part of the class.
2. TEACHER TALKS
- I love to watch the other children in my class because I learn from them.
- One thing I noticed is that whenever the teacher talks, all the other children follow
her directions the FIRST TIME.
- Our teacher doesn't have to tell anyone anything twice.
- She's in charge and everyone respects her and listens the FIRST TIME.
- They know and so do I, that the teacher makes all the rules for the class.
- That's why it's so important to follow the teacher's direction's just like everyone
else.
3. NOT LISTENING
- People want to talk to me a lot of the time.
- I ALWAYS stop what I'm doing and look at whoever is talking to me.
- I need to pay attention and hear ALL the important things that grown-ups tell me.
- When someone talks to me, I better listen the first time.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I'll lose all my friends.
- My friends listen to other people and they want me to be the same way.
- I like when people stop doing stuff when I talk to them.
- So when someone talks to me, I can stop everything IMMEDIATELY & pay attention to
them.
4. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- I talk to a lot of people and a lot of people talk to me.
- When I'm in a conversation it's always good to stay in one place.
- When I move back and forth or fidget in my chair it makes people stare at me and stop
paying attention to me.
- In my chair I should keep my hands in my lap and my feet in front of me.
- I can forget what I was going to say and my friends will walk away from me.
- All my friends know how to sit and stand still.
- When I stand and sit still everyone pays attention to me because there are no
distractions.
- I know the best way to keep my friends is to stay still when we're talking.
5. BULLYING
- When I see someone playing with something that's mine I know I should let them.
- It's not a good idea to fight with someone when they're playing with my things.
- If I share, I know grown-ups will know that I'm a big boy.
- It's really nice to share because it gives other kids a chance to enjoy my toys.
- That makes other kids happy which makes me happy.
- If someone is playing with something that's mine I just back off and let them play.
- If I yell and don't back off, then other kids will think I'm a bully.
- I don't want that; I want kids to like me so I always give them a chance if they want
to play with my things.
6. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- When a grown-up tells me to do something, I listen the FIRST time.
- Nobody should ever have to tell someone something more than once.
- When I talk, I want other people to listen to me the first time also.
- When I listen the first time, grown-ups know that I respect them.
- Babies talk back or don't listen the first time and that's O.K..
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time they're told to do something.
- I know this because I notice other kids listening.
- I ALWAYS listen the first time -- that's what big boys do.
7. LOOKING AT PEOPLE
- My name is very special.
- When people say, "[name]" it means they want to talk to ME and nobody else.
- When someone says, "[name]" I always stop whatever I'm doing and look and
answer.
- People use my name to call me because they love me and they know if I LOOK at them and
ANSWER right away it means that I love them too.
- I want everyone to know I love them so I always look and listen whenever someone says,
"[name]".
8. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- I'm very smart so a lot of people want to ask me things.
- I love it when people ask me questions because I know it means they find me
interesting.
- Sometimes when grown-ups ask me things, I don't answer them the first time.
- This makes them think I'm dumb.
- They have to ask me over and over and that gets them frustrated.
- I know because I get frustrated when grown-ups don't answer me the first time.
- The only way ANYONE will know how smart I am is if I answer their questions AS SOON AS
I hear them.
- Part of being smart is answering questions quickly.
- I want everyone to know how smart I am so I will ALWAYS answer everyone the first time.
9. WATCHING OTHER KIDS
- I love to play with other kids.
- I play with them in the park and watch everything they do.
- I play with kids at school and watch everything they do.
- I play with my friends at day camp and watch them there too.
- I know when I watch all the other kids, I will always learn new things.
- When I learn new things, I can teach them to my brother later.
- I can also tell mommy and daddy all the new things I learned watching other kids.
- That makes them VERY proud of me.
10. NO HITTING - LISTENING TO TEACHERS
- I am not allowed to hit or push people.
- Hitting or pushing is one of the worst things that anybody can do.
- When someone hits, it means they have no respect for other people.
- I respect other people and their feelings.
- If someone hits me, I never hit back. I tell the teacher or a grown-up instead.
- I know if I hit someone, they'll tell on me too.
- I CAN NEVER HIT OR PUSH ANYONE!
1. FOLLOWING THE GROUP
- I always listen when the teacher gives instructions to the entire class.
- I pay careful attention to what she says because I know everyone else is and I want to
participate.
- Another kind of instructions I follow are the ones that are on a tape.
- Just like with a teacher, the tape tells the whole group what to do and I need to
listen just as carefully.
- When I follow all the instructions I fit in with everyone and that makes me happy.
2. TEACHER TALKS
- Sometimes when I'm in school, the teacher gives the classroom instructions on how to do
things.
- When I look around me I notice that all the kids are paying attention to the teacher's
words.
- All the kids follow the teacher's instructions because like me, they know that when a
teacher talks they have to listen the first time.
- Teachers are very smart and they know how to do a lot of things better than I can.
- I can learn a lot from teachers so I always pay attention when they talk.
- If I don't listen the first time I might miss something and fall behind the rest of the
class.
- I love fitting in with the rest of my class so I listen to the teacher and follow her
directions, just like the rest of the kids.
3. NOT LISTENING
- People want to talk to me all the time.
- When someone talks to me I stop what I'm doing and pay total attention to them.
- I would not like if someone did not listen to ME!
- Only people who look and listen hear EVERYTHING there is to hear.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I won't HAVE any friends.
- Friends are VERY important, so I always pay attention when people talk to me.
4. STANDING AND SITTING STILL
- I love to talk to people.
- No matter how exciting it is to have a conversation it's best if I sit or stand still
when talking.
- If I keep moving the people I'm talking to will stare at what I'm moving instead of
looking into my eyes.
- When other people don't look into my eyes they can't understand what I'm saying.
- When I sit or stand still people will hear everything I have to say and I like that.
5. BULLYING
- When I yell at my brother or another kid that makes them upset.
- I really don't want to upset other kids and make them cry because it makes me sad to
see other people sad.
- It's even worse if I smile or laugh at people who are crying.
- It's better to be really nice to someone who's crying or sad, especially if I made them
sad.
- I'm going to try to stay out of fights with my brother and other kids.
6. LISTENING THE FIRST TIME
- I do what I'm told the FIRST time.
- I know that nobody should have to repeat themselves because I didn't listen the first
time.
- When I DON'T listen the first time it's usually because I'm stuck.
- When I get stuck, I can't learn and I frustrate EVERYONE!
- I'm VERY proud of myself when I listen the first time and the grown-ups are proud also.
7. LOOKING AT PEOPLE
- I watch people a lot and one thing I've noticed is that whenever people call each
other's names they LOOK and LISTEN to each other.
- When people say, "[name]" I know they're talking to me and nobody else so I
always stop what I'm doing and look right at them.
- Paying attention to people when they talk to me makes them feel very special and let's
them know how much I LOVE them.
- The longer I pay attention to people after they say, "[Name]", the more they
will love me.
- Also, the faster I stop what I'm doing and look at the person who said my name, the
more they will know I love them.
- I ALWAYS LOOK AT EVERYONE RIGHT AWAY AND FOR A LONG TIME AFTER THEY CALL MY NAME.
8. ANSWERING THE FIRST TIME
- When someone calls my name, I know I BETTER answer them IMMEDIATELY!
- That way they know I'm paying COMPLETE attention.
- All kids and grown-ups like it when I pay attention to them.
- When someone calls me and I don't answer the first time they think I'm not friendly.
- I am friendly, so it bothers me when people think I'm not.
- I wouldn't like someone who didn't answer ME when I called THEM!
- I will ALWAYS answer people the first time so EVERYONE will know how friendly I REALLY
am.
9. WATCHING OTHER KIDS
- Kids know how to do many things.
- I know because I always pay careful attention to them when they're around.
- I love to imitate what other kids do especially when they're being good.
- When I'm near other kids I watch them very carefully because I want to keep up with
them.
- If I stop paying attention they might move onto something else without me.
- I don't want that to happen.
- I want to keep my friends so I watch them closely when they're around.
10. NO HITTING - LISTENING TO TEACHERS
- Hitting or pushing is bad.
- Only bad people hit or push.
- When someone hits or pushes it doesn't only hurt the person where they were hit, it
also hurts their feelings.
- I have a lot of respect for other people's feelings so I NEVER hit or push.
- If I hit or push someone, they will tell on me and they should.
- I never argue with a grown-up who's talking to me about hitting or pushing because I
know that this is a VERY SERIOUS thing to talk about.
- They need to let me know how wrong it is to hit and how you have to respect others.
- I must ALWAYS listen to adults and teachers about hitting and pushing.
- If someone hits or pushes me first, I should tell on them and NOT hit or push them
back.
- I will NEVER hit or push anyone because I know it is SO WRONG.
MASTER LIST STORIES
"Master Lists" were what we called the final series of the Social Stories we
did. We gave them this name because the "themes" of these stories bled into
several drills (Role Play - Dolls/Puppets, Appropriate Play, Pretend/Fantasy Play, etc. --
we'll eventually type these up) and, at this point, the language of these stories was an
integral part of our common redirections in real life. Our son (the human instant-replay)
had memorized the earliest stories, forcing three versions of each. By this time, he had
also memorized their titles and would gleefully request specific stories by name. For the
"Master List" stories you can see we removed the titles. Our therapists had been
doing variations of these for so long, they were easily able to improvise and mix &
match around each of the versions here. Therapy had now become more "natural"
and needed to resemble and segue into real life. We were very consciously transitioning
things we said away from "therapy" language and toward that which he might hear
from teachers, peers, etc. These were among the last steps in transferring stimulus
control to his teachers and peers (i.e., the language had to begin to match). He was in
school without a shadow (& without anyone at the school having knowledge of his
autism) at the end of using series 3 and during the time of these "Masters." It
was also at about this time that we started calling his "therapists" his
"babysitters". This came in handy since he was constantly mentioning their names
to those in the outside world he was becoming a part of.
P.S. - WATCH OUT for #1 - The Golden Rule. Boy did he perseverate on turning THAT one
around on us! (-;
1.
- The most important rule of all time is the Golden Rule, "do unto others as you
would have them do unto you."
- That means you shouldn't do something that you wouldn't want someone to do to you.
- Boy is that an important rule!
- Breaking the Golden Rule makes people think you don't like them or care about what
happens to them.
- If I hurt someone's feelings, I have to think about how I would feel if that person did
the same thing to me.
- The Golden Rule also has a good side.
- I should do the same good things to people that I would want them to do for me.
- People will know I like them if I do good things for them and if I'm nice to them.
- I know people will treat me good if I treat them good.
- That's the Golden Rule and I know I can stick to it.
2.
- When people talk to me, it's usually something I need to hear.
- It's important to look at people & stop what I'm doing when they have something to
tell me.
- Sometimes grown-ups and kids tell me VERY important things that I need to know.
- If I don't look & listen I might miss the message that they're trying to give me.
- All the other kids look and listen when people talk to them.
- I know it's wrong to keep doing what I'm doing when grown-ups want me to listen.
- When people talk to me, I will STOP what I'm doing and look & listen to them.
3.
- I LOVE to hear what other people have to say.
- I NEVER turn away from anyone when I'm in a conversation.
- Looking at people is a VERY important part of talking to them.
- If I turn away I will hurt their feelings.
- They will think I don't care about them.
- It's impossible to understand what someone is saying when you're not looking at them.
- People like me better when I look at them, it makes them WANT to talk to me.
- I promise to stay still and look at everyone who talks to me.
- I'm want to be a good friend and I'm PROUD to be a good friend.
4.
- Sometimes I want to say things VERY badly.
- It feels like I HAVE to say it RIGHT THAT SECOND.
- It's important to wait until the other person is finished talking otherwise I'm
interrupting and changing the subject.
- Even though it FEELS important, it CAN wait.
- They will listen to me BETTER if I wait patiently.
- When I interrupt, it just ANGERS people.
- People wonder, "what's wrong with him?" and "why can't he wait?"
- One of the MOST important times to wait patiently before talking is in circle time or
when a teacher is giving a lesson.
- I also know that "excuse me" means I'm asking if I can interrupt.
- Even if I'm told to wait, I can STILL tell them later and EVERYONE will like me MORE.
5.
- It's IMPORTANT to listen to grown-ups the first time.
- The worst thing I can do is ignore grown-ups, even for a second.
- A grown-up shouldn't have to tell me something more than once.
- When I listen the first time, grown-ups are proud of me and I'M proud of myself.
- If I don't listen, grown-ups might think I'm a baby who doesn't know HOW to listen.
- My friends will also think I'm a baby because they're not babies and they listen the
first time.
- I'm a big boy because I ALWAYS listen the first time.
- Nobody ever has to ask me something more than once because I listen quickly and I like
controlling myself.
6.
- When I do something wrong I feel terrible not only for what I did, but for hurting
another person's feelings.
- Usually when I do something that hurts someone, they tell me right away and they're
mad.
- That makes me feel even worse because I like people and never want to make them feel
bad.
- The best thing to do after doing something wrong is to apologize to the person I hurt.
- Saying "I'm sorry" helps the person I hurt feel a little bit better and that
makes me feel a little bit better too.
- When a teacher or any grown-up punishes me or gives me a time-out for doing something
wrong, the worst thing I could do is talk back.
- The best thing I could do is apologize. Then after the punishment or time-out is over,
everyone will respect me more.
- I don't have to explain the reason I did what I did since grown-ups already know the
reason without me saying it.
- Knowing that grown-ups understand helps me stop myself from talking back to them.
7.
- Grown-ups are in charge and make the rules and decide things.
- Grown-ups have different sets of rules than kids.
- They make up the rules for grown-ups and kids.
- I never see kids making up rules for anyone.
- It seems unfair since kids can't do all the things that grown-ups can.
- It's important to respect what grown-ups say and do; they know best.
- I'm not a grown-up and I can't pretend I'm a grown-up.
- I can learn a lot from grown-ups especially if I follow their rules.
8.
- Sometimes it's very clear what I'm supposed to be doing, like in school when I need to
go to certain areas.
- Sometimes it's not exactly clear what I should do and I'm kind of on my own to decide
what to do.
- In these free times when the rules don't seem clear they really are.
- The rules haven't changed at all!
- I just have to be sure that I follow all the same rules and behave just as good.
- In these free times, I'm in charge of myself and I will make everyone, my teachers and
parents, so proud that I don't need them to keep me well behaved.
- I can behave myself all by myself.
9.
- When I see other kids playing I always want to join them and have fun.
- Sometimes when I ask to join in the other kids say "no".
- That's OK, I can play with them later, find other kids to play with, or just do
something else.
- It's also important when playing with other kids to let them express their own ideas.
- Everyone gets a turn at having their say and using their ideas.
- I can learn from other kids' ideas.
- Their suggestions can make playing more interesting when I'm on my own or playing with
new kids.
10.
- I love talking to people, especially my friends.
- When I talk to people, I need to give them their space & stay away from their
faces.
- I also don't lean on them or lay all over them.
- EVERYBODY needs space.
- My space bubble helps me keep good space.
- When I get too close, it makes other people uncomfortable and they want to get away
from me.
- They might not want to ever talk to me again.
- When I look around I notice that the other kids know just how much space to give.
- They don't lay all over or lean all over each other EVER!
- I want to be just like them.
- When I give people enough space, they want to talk with me and be my friend.
11.
- I spend a lot of my day with other kids.
- When I'm with other kids I pay close attention to everything they do because I can
learn a lot from them.
- The other kids like to spend time with me too.
- Kids should always work together and play together and watch each other closely.
- The reason I have so many friends is that I'm very interested in what they do.
- That's because I always watch them.
12.
- I love playing with other kids.
- The most interesting and fun times I have are when I join kids who are already playing.
- I do this by asking in a nice and gentle voice, "Can I play with you?"
- If they say yes, then I ask, "teach me how to play" or "show me what
you're doing".
- When I join other kids who are playing, I really feel like I have friends and that I
belong to the group.
- I also know that I'm NOT ALLOWED to touch other kids when I play with them or else
they'll be mad at me.
- As long as I keep joining other kids and don't touch them, I'll be popular and have
lots of friends.
13.
- I love to talk to other people and other people like to hear me talk.
- I don't have to yell for other people to be interested in what I have to say.
- As a matter of fact, if I talk in a gentle tone and don't shout people will care more
about what I have to say.
- I must always use my real voice in conversations.
- When I use my real voice and speak quietly, people listen to what I say.
- I like that.
-
1.
- I must always be sure to treat everyone the way that I would want them to treat me.
- That means I should always treat people nice and kind since that's how I would want to
be treated.
- That also means that I shouldn't be mean to people or hurt them since I wouldn't want
to be treated poorly.
- That's the Golden Rule and I know I must always follow it!
2.
- People want to talk to me a lot of the time.
- I ALWAYS stop what I'm doing and look at whoever is talking to me.
- I need to pay attention and hear the message that people tell me.
- When someone talks to me, I better listen the first time.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I'll lose all my friends.
- My friends listen to other people and they want me to be the same way.
- I like when people stop doing stuff when I talk to them.
- So when someone talks to me, I can stop everything immediately & pay attention to
them.
3.
- I LOVE having friends!
- I have GREAT conversations with the kids I play with.
- I would be hurt if MY friends walked away from ME!
- If I see other kids playing something else, I NEVER walk away from my friends.
- If I did walk away, I'd hurt my friends' feelings.
- They would ALWAYS remember that I walked away & would NEVER want to play with me
again.
- If I stay with my friends they'll always stay with me and be my friends.
4.
- Sometimes I want to say things very badly and it feels like I have to say it RIGHT that
second.
- It's important to control myself and WAIT until the other person is finished talking.
- People will pay MORE attention to me if I wait my turn.
- I have to be especially careful not to blurt things out and interrupt when it's circle
time or when a teacher is giving a lesson because they wouldn't want me to change the
subject.
- When I interrupt, it makes people very mad. I don't like it when someone interrupts ME!
- Sometimes when I say "excuse me" I still have to wait a minute because
"excuse me" is only asking permission to interrupt.
- If I wait patiently, I can STILL tell them later and everyone will like me more.
5.
- When a grown-up tells me to do something, I listen the FIRST time.
- Nobody should ever have to tell someone something more than once.
- When I talk, I want other people to listen to me the first time also.
- When I listen the first time, grown-ups know that I respect them.
- Babies talk back or don't listen the first time and that's O.K.
- Big boys ALWAYS listen the first time they're told to do something.
- I know this because I notice other kids listening.
- I ALWAYS listen the first time -- that's what big boys do.
6.
- Sometimes I do something that makes other kids or grown-ups angry at me and they tell
me.
- When this happens I never argue but instead apologize.
- Saying "I'm sorry" shows people that I feel bad about making them feel bad
and that helps me stay friends with them.
- If I get a time-out or get punished, the right thing to do is apologize and not try to
explain since grown-ups already understand why I did what I did.
- I always remember to apologize quickly after doing something wrong.
7.
- Sometimes I see a grown-up do things that I'm not allowed to do.
- It's seems unfair but I know it's OK since I realize that grown-ups make the rules, not
kids.
- One day I'm going to be a grown-up and I'll be able to make rules too.
- I'm not a grown-up yet so I shouldn't pretend I'm one ever.
- The only way I'll learn is if I follow grown-ups' rules while I'm still a kid.
- When I don't follow a grown-up's rules, they get angry at me and sometimes yell at me.
- I don't like when grown-ups get mad at me.
- I'm a good boy who follows all the rules that grown-ups make.
8.
- Sometimes the grown-ups aren't around to tell me what to do.
- Other times the grown-ups are too busy to be watching what I do as carefully as they
usually do.
- You know what I do in these situations?
- I follow all the same rules as if the adults were paying careful attention to me.
- That's what mature kids do.
- Besides, if I act up when a grown-up isn't watching me as carefully, they'll probably
catch me and I'll get into a lot of trouble.
- I behave whether or not a grown-up is close by and watching.
9.
- Kids don't always want to play with me and that's fine.
- I know that there's usually a good reason -- like they're already in the middle of what
they're doing and it wouldn't be fair for me to interrupt and make them start all over.
- I don't let it bother me when a kid doesn't want to play with me because I know I can
do something else or play with them later.
- When I play with kids I don't push my ideas on my friends and force them to play using
only my ideas.
- The fair thing is to share ideas; it's kind of like turn-taking with ideas.
- People can learn from my ideas and of course I can learn from theirs.
10.
- I love talking to people, and when I do I give them enough space.
- When I talk to people TOO close they get very uncomfortable.
- I also know that I should NEVER lean on anyone or touch them.
- I don't like it when other people talk too close to MY face or lean on me.
- My friends like me better when I give them enough space.
- I ALWAYS make sure to use my space bubble and give enough space all the time.
11.
- I love to play with other kids.
- I play with them in the park and watch everything they do.
- I play with kids at school and watch everything they do.
- I play with my friends at day camp and watch them there too.
- I know when I watch all the other kids, I will always learn new things.
- When I learn new things, I can teach them to my brother later.
- I can also tell mommy and daddy all the new things I learned watching other kids.
- That makes them very proud of me.
12.
- Sometimes I walk into my class and I see groups of kids already playing or doing
something.
- Whenever I see that happening, I walk over to see what they're doing.
- It's always something interesting so I always ask in a nice, gentle way "can I
play with you?"
- Of course the kids usually say, "yes" since most kids want to be my friend
when I'm nice.
- Once I'm invited to join them, I always ask, "how do you play?" or "how
do you do this?" so I can really be a part of the group.
- One thing I know is that I'm not allowed to touch the other kids when I play with them
or they will probably stop playing with me.
- If I keep joining other kids and groups of kids and ask how to play with them, I will
learn lots of new games and have so many friends.
- I like that!
13.
- The most pleasant sound in the world is someone's gentle, quiet voice.
- When I yell or don't use my real voice, it makes people uncomfortable.
- Talking loud makes people want to get away from me.
- I try really hard to speak in a soft, gentle tone so people will listen to me.
- Not only do people like me better when I use my best voice, but I feel more relaxed
too.
-
1.
- Mommy and daddy have always told me that good things happen to good boys.
- People will usually treat me the way that I treat them so when I'm a good boy, people
will treat me good and when I'm nasty to others they probably won't treat me so well.
- Treating people the way you want to be treated is really another way of saying the
Golden Rule.
- The Golden Rule is to do to others what you would hope they would do to you.
- Since I know that following this rule will make people treat me better, I always try to
follow it.
- I want to have good things and be happy.
2.
- People want to talk to me all the time.
- When someone talks to me I stop what I'm doing and pay total attention to them.
- I would not like it if someone did not listen to ME!
- Only people who look and listen hear EVERYTHING there is to hear and don't miss the
message.
- If I don't stop what I'm doing when people talk to me, I won't HAVE any friends.
- Friends are VERY important, so I always pay attention when people talk to me.
3.
- I LOVE playing with my friends!
- When I'm playing a game or sport, I stay with my friends the WHOLE time.
- I don't leave them even if something else that's interesting is happening nearby.
- If I did that, I would ruin the game for everyone and nobody would want to play with
me.
- I wouldn't someone to ruin the game for ME!
- Friends are too important to lose, so I'll stick with them the WHOLE time.
4.
- Sometimes I feel like I can't STOP myself from talking!
- When that happens, I give EVERYONE a headache!
- The worst is when I interrupt circle time or a teacher's lesson.
- Nobody likes someone who always has to talk and keeps changing the subject.
- I don't like people who are that way!
- I like to only talk when I REALLY have something to say.
- If I feel like I must talk when someone is busy with something I say, "excuse
me" which really means, "can I interrupt?"
- Sometimes I will be allowed to talk but sometimes I'll have to wait, and that's OK.
5.
- I do what I'm told the FIRST time.
- I know that nobody should have to repeat themselves because I didn't listen the first
time.
- When I get stuck I can't learn and I frustrate EVERYONE!
- I'm VERY proud of myself when I listen the first time and the grown-ups are proud also.
6.
- When I do something wrong and don't apologize do you know what people think?
- They think I don't care about them and they think I did something wrong because I'm
mean and don't respect them.
- That's not true, I really do care a lot about people and that's why I always apologize
after doing something wrong.
- Saying "I'm sorry" shows people that I really didn't mean to hurt them and
that I'm really a good person.
- I also never argue when someone points out that I've done something wrong and hurt
them.
- They're already hurt and arguing will only make them feel worse.
- Also, grown ups understand why I did what I did without me having to explain.
- I want to make them feel better and that's why I apologize quickly after doing
something wrong.
7.
- When a grown-up tells me to do something I better listen.
- They make the rules for the grown-ups and the kids.
- I have to have respect for what they say since they're older and know better than I do.
- The rules they make up are for my own good.
- I don't know how to make up good rules yet so I better pay attention to the grown-ups
rules so I can learn.
- Someday I'm going to be a grown-up but since I'm still a kid I can't make up any rules
yet.
- I can learn by paying attention to all the grown-ups rules.
8.
- It's pretty easy to follow all the rules and behave when there are grown-ups around who
are watching me carefully.
- The tough thing is behaving when the adults are busy with something else.
- It's not always clear that there are rules but since I already know many of the
grown-up rules, I don't have a problem behaving.
- Even when the grown-ups aren't paying close attention I still know how to behave
especially good.
9.
- Kids don't always let me play with them when I ask.
- That doesn't bother me that much because I know there's probably a good reason -- like
maybe they're in the middle of their game or something.
- I can always play with them later or find someone else to play with instead.
- When other kids do want to play with me I let them have their own ideas about how we'll
play.
- It's never right for me to take over and use only MY ideas in a game.
- The games are much more interesting when ideas are shared.
- More kids will want to be friends with me if I don't act like I'm in charge.
10.
- I LOVE talking to my friends!
- I NEVER get too close when I'm in a conversation.
- I also never LEAN on them or LAY on them or TOUCH them.
- Nobody likes to have someone in their face or all over them EVER.
- I have LOTS of friends because I always give them their space when I talk to them and
they give me my space when they talk to me!
11.
- Kids know how to do many things.
- I know because I always pay careful attention to them when they're around.
- I love to imitate what other kids do especially when they're being good.
- When I'm near other kids I watch them very carefully because I want to keep up with
them.
- If I stop paying attention they might move onto something else without me.
- I don't want that to happen.
- I want to keep my friends so I watch them closely when they're around.
12.
- When I walk into my class in the morning I always see kids doing stuff together in
groups.
- This is very interesting to me so I always walk over and ask in a nice, gentle voice if
I can join them.
- I don't always know how to do exactly what the others are doing so I ask HOW to do
things.
- I always listen carefully when the other kids tell me how to do what they're doing.
- Then I join them.
- Everybody wants to be my friend because I love to participate in the group.
- The teachers also know that I love being a big part of the class.
13.
- Sometimes I'm very excited when I talk to someone and I say things too loud or forget
to use my real voice
- This is not a good thing.
- Nobody wants to hear a loudmouth!
- I know I would rather talk to someone who speaks gently than someone who yells. I'd
also rather speak to people who use a real voice.
- I always use my real voice and speak in a gentle tone so people will want to listen to
me.
Notes from the program
P.N is "parent's note."
#5, 16, 17 - Used examples of [playdate] in school for #5; #16: used myself
& [name]; #17: gave ex. of a boy listening to mom first time someone asked him to pick
up his toys. She rewarded him and he felt proud of himself.
#4, 6, 8, 13 - He was touching his toes. Used everything from imitation to phys
interv, to pointing, DROing when he stopped, T.O. warning. When I had him sit on the
chair, he refused, got o/o control & pushed my hands away. T.O. from Megan. Sitting
funny when he came back so Jim tempted him w/a trip to [preferred store name] and he got
under control. DRO and finished drill nicely.
Sitting poor at beg. Used observational learning & got it under control. #7,
17 - 19. Accepted prompts beautifully. Used stories reflecting both his & anther
person's perspective. DRO'd quiet sitting & eye contact. which responded to non- phys
interv & observ learning.
#9, 2, 16 - Some initial squirming on chair that responded to control statements
& list to grown-up. Talked about social stories in relation to school experience
today. Interested & responded well. DRO.
#7,6,5,4,13,9 - He did really well. We switched roles for a while & he
pretended to be the teacher. He sat still & had great e.c. DRO'd.
P.N. - Please do #s that haven't been covered like [#s listed here]. These cane
be presented in a positive or negative way (remember... all different perspectives).
Please try to keep the repetitions even.
#2,4,3,10,11,8 - Did some as himself, then he was [other therapist--not the one
doing the drill] and I was him. Did lots of ?s, social stories. He loved it. When sitting
poorly I said "[other therapist] doesn't sit like THAT." He was very careful to
remember good behavior. DRO'd him for good job. I did lots of weird things and he told me
to stop AND why.
#1,10,13 - I started off with a T.O. story to make him aware of his nonsense,
babbling, etc. Talked about why adults give time outs to little kids b/c they don't
listen, etc. ... #10 - Not listening: Story about me when I was 5. Didn't listen to
teacher announcing a party in school. Missed out on important time b/c I didn't look at
teacher - Perspective taking. #13 - Told story about me stepping on nail b/c I wasn't
looking. He wavered w/attention back & forth. Did a lot of control statements. He was
also fidgeting. DRO'd any good behaviors.
P.N. - Nobody's done [#s listed]. When you're all telling your stories, are you
hitting the bullet points from both your perspective and his? Also you must hit all bullet
points in each story. Notes please.
We talked about stuff from all perspectives. He did well (lots of hand and foot
stuff -- gesturing and pointing worked). Then, on break while I was writing notes, he made
noises. Had to go back to work when he worked well. He got to go on a break and we played
mummy (this time I was the mummy).
#12,15,4 - From various perspectives. Trouble sitting in chair (gesturing and pt
did not work - but phys interv did). DRO'd quiet sitting & getting into control.
Prompted self-pride statements.
#2,4,5,14 - Nat. Reinforcer - Playing Chutes & Ladders. Lots of hand stuff
but constant gesturing worked. He was out of control. Talk of Chutes & Ladders stopped
this. He was very reluctant to accept prompts.
#10,11,19 - Got my dose of T.O. with him. He wasn't listening & did hand
stuff. Soc Stories were really good. He listened to them and I let him tell his own story
as a reinforcer. I think he's beginning to memorize them.
#16,1,5,9 - Social stories using events of the school day. He was interested.
Needed some prompting for sitting (a bowel movement was imminent), but overall did a great
job.
#2,5,9,11,13,15 - He was grimacing & tensing body. Needed T.O. Took chair
away. Talked about what he learned from T.O. - that & promise of Pepsi got him under
control. He started the drill on a bad note, then ended on great one. DRO for doing well.
Got to play w/dolls but kept talking to himself so he got called back to work.
P.N. - Perfect. Thanks for doing so many!
Jim and I did stories #1-11. We read them to him & when he was sitting very
quietly, he got to read one. He tried occasionally to repeat lines I was saying. By end of
this he would stop himself from repeating with only a gesture. Heavily DRO'd this.
P.N. - There are now THREE sets of stories. Next do #12 to 19 on Version #1.
Set #1 - Stories #12-19. Still had to work on sitting still & remind him to
not repeat. Observ learning - when he was reading to me, I made noises with my hands and
he went back to reading story on interrupting to me (really cute -- he has the idea).
DRO'd quiet sitting. Perspective taking.
P.N. - Please do set 2, #1 - #10.
Did Set 2, #1-10 and 15. He got to read 15 to me as a natural reinforcer. He sat
well with great hands & e.c. DRO'd for this.
P.N. - Please do set 2, #11 - 14 and #16 - 19.
Did #11-14 and 16-19. He had a few T.O.s for not listening. They were long and
we went over them while reading stories. He interrupted a few times. Jim had him read the
interrupting story and answered lots of ?s about it. Snapped back into shape towards the
end.
Set 3 - #1-10. 10: he read to me. Beautiful sitting. Constant DRO for good
hands/no faces & feet when they were still. Great job. EC [eye contact] not great, but
also DRO'd when possible.
P.N. - Please do set 3 - #11-19.
Set 3 - #11-19. Read stories. Had to stop a couple of times b/c he interrupted.
Used one story as natural reinforcer for him to read when good. Sitting was terrible. He
sat sideways and look was also off. He concentrated on books so I stopped reading and said
"where's [his name]?"
P.N. - Please do set 2 - #1-10 (in random order).
Set 2 - #1-10 (random). Needed gesture prompts to keep hands & feet quiet
but when he was able to sit quietly through 2 stories, he got to read me one. Overall nice
job - DRO (-: [the smiley face was right-side up with a circle around it].
P.N. - Pls. do set 2, #11-19.
Allowed him to read "rules" and "predicting" b/c he was so
great while I read to him. Needed gesture prompts, first for hands, then for feed, but got
under control later. DRO.
P.N. - Pls. do set 1, #15-24 (random order).
Lots of hand/feet stuff. This responded to gestures, but facial expressions did
not respond to gestures, phys interv. Got a T.O. for making interrupting noises when I was
scripting about facial stuff, then did story #24. Got in beautiful control at end. Got
break but didn't get chance to read b/c he wasn't in control (prompted a conversation
about this).
P.N. - [name of therapist]: pls. do set 2, #1-5 and #21-24 (random). P.N. -
[name of therapist]: pls. do set 3, #6-10 and #21-24 (random).
So zoney - tried task - didn't work well. Only for a second. He was talking
while I was talking. Blowing cheeks out w/air and said it was b/c he was thirsty. Labeled
it an "excuse".
Set 3, #6-10 & #21-24. He was great. Sat beautifully & paid great attn.
Nice job w/answering questions I THREW OUT AT HIM. He got a natural reinforcer (read a
story) for being great.
P.N. - Pls. do set 1, #1-12 (random).
Did 1, #1-12. Started out nicely but had to do T.O. b/c he didn't pay attn. It
was a long one b/c he tried to make me open my eyes. He finally gained control and we went
over T.O. He understood why he had the T.O. and why it was so long. I made him listen to
the "calling out" story 3x so that he can show me he could listen. He gained
nice control towards end. DRO'd good sitting. Hand stuff was problem in the beginning.
P.N. - [therapist name], please do set 1, #13-24 (random).
He did really well -- I was very pleased w/his affect and response. He drank all
his milk during this drill. Huge reinforcement. As soon as he finished we went on to
"let's play" [drill] as a natural reinforcer (go back to this drill later). He
wanted me to tell him a story about a little boy who couldn't control himself. He said
"make sure after each Q&A you go back to what he did wrong" bizarrely with
the exact words and in the same tone I've said it so many times. I labeled that as
"repeating". DRO'd for everything else.
P.N. - [therapist name], please do set 2, #13-24.
Social stories rel to school stuff. Needed prompts not to saliva swish &
make faces. DRO'd quiet face. Worked on foot stuff.
Set 2, #13-24. Really nice job. He sat beautifully & I reviewed stories by
asking questions in reverse & by giving him personal examples. He did a little of the
mouth stuff but stopped as soon as we did "weird" story. DRO'd this b/c I didn't
have to point it out and he said it himself.
P.N. - Pls. do set 3, #1-12.
Did above. He had some trouble sitting still. Was rocking sideways and doing
weird hand things. I scripted good behaviors, had [playdate] point things out to him too.
He finally sat better and paid attn. when I threatened a T.O. (and "[playdate]
leaving"). Was good a few more minutes but ultimately results with another T.O. and
Jim intervening.
P.N. - Please do Set 3, #13-24 (random).
Did set 3, 13-24. He needed multiple reminders about hands & paying attn.
Seemed very distracted by others. DRO'd any opportunity. I had when I saw good behaviors.
Used reading story to me as natural reinforcer.
P.N. - Please do Set 1, all EVEN #s in random order (2,4,6...to 24).
Set 1, even #s random: Needed prompts & stories for hand stuff but responded
to non-verbal prompts. No face stuff. DRO. At 1st he requested story that he wanted to
read. I used prediction story & surprise and didn't let him read it. Later on when he
was behaving well and didn't ask for specific story, I gave it to him and reminded him
that when he doesn't guess, good things happen.
P.N. - Pls. do set #1. All odd #s in random order (1,3,5...23)
Did set 1 all odd random. DRO'd no face stuff. Hands were pretty good. Sometimes
seemed glassy & not paying attn when I read. I'd ask him what that was about and he'd
guess. I then turned around & pretended to read to other people. He promised he'd pay
attn and he did. Answered ?s and spontaneously told me what story I was on. DRO'd attn
& listening first time. Got to read a story as natural reinforcer.
P.N. - Pls. do set 2, even #s in random order (#2,4,6....24).
Said he wanted to read "tuning into people" b/c he always reads that
one.
P.N. - Watch for this. Be careful not to announce names.
Talked about rules, making noises & stretching. Talked about doing weird
things. Heavily reinforced appropriate behavior. Prompted about making noises. Said he
wasn't. Ignored. He touched my face and I left. This happened 2x during this drill, 2nd
time while I was explaining why it happened. Got into control then for a nice period of
time and gave him natural reinforcer (story) at end.
Did set 2, odd #s random. Really difficult at beg. Making faces and not looking.
Tilting head. Heavily DRO'd any control he showed. Tried to engage me in argument about
excuse he was making. I immediately put my head down. He grabbed my head to try to make me
look at him. I left room. He started to scream but then calmed down & was able to sit
quietly for duration of T.O. & think about what he did. DRO. Remainder of stories went
well (w/heavy DRO for control & no faces). ALMOST....he lost it again in the end, so
he couldn't get natural reinforcer. Got huge T.O. for hitting w/screaming.
P.N. - Pls. do set 3, #1-12 (random).
Did 3, 1-12 (random). Not too bad. A little zoney but I managed to sustain his
attn. i.e., started reading in very low voice & he said I can't hear you. Asked ?s in
various forms. If he didn't answer b/c of not listening, I simply told him "forget
it" and "I'm skipping this since you're not interested in what I have to
say." This got him to pay attn again. Heavily DRO'd very good sitting & tried not
to attract any attn to bad behaviors. Let him read one story b/c he answered &
listened to stories.
P.N. - GREAT!
P.N. - Pls. do set 3, #13-24 (random).
Did 13-16 b/c Megan said to do just four. Did great job w/most except for
looking -- gesture prompt took care of that. DRO'd for no noises/faces.
P.N. - Pls. do 17-20 (pick from different sets, random order).
Set 3, #17-20; set 2, #20. Very good job. Sat nicely. This went quickly. He
asked me "why didn't you ask me what stories you read?" I said "Well I saw
you were listening so I didn't need to ask you any ?s" He smiled & named all the
stories I read to him. Told him the "names" weren't important. DRO'd listening.
He was very proud -- I scripted this for him.
P.N. - Please do #20-24 (from different sets, random order).
Set 2 - #20, 3 - #23, #22, 1 - #21. He kept asking to read story. I told him he
has to listen 1st time & sit quietly to read. Finally he got into control & got to
read "pacing". Gesture prompts worked for hand & face stuff. DRO'd absence
of these behaviors. Still hands & face.
P.N. - Pls. pick any four (4) from any set!
Set 2 - #8, 3 - #2, 1 - #1 & #10. Had him stand up while I read stories.
DRO'd standing still. Needed reminder not to touch hands & to look while I'm talking.
Overall not too bad considering all the T.O.s he had earlier.
P.N. - Pls. pick any four (4) except 8, 2, 1 & 10, from any set!
Set 3 - #3 & 5, 2 - #11 & 14. Practiced standing still. Lots of leaning.
This stopped with mention of natural reinforcer for good behavior. I'd pop out the seven
dwarfs in book for him. This worked. He got to read story for standing. One face --
gesture prompt took care of it and then DRO. Tried to climb under my knee. I just said his
name & he stopped. DRO for listening 1st time.
P.N. - Pls. do random sets #4,6,7,12.
Nat reinforcer - Pepsi & reading story to me. Did standing. Interrupted me
2x. Didn't get natural reinforcer until he didn't interrupt & stood nicely in one
place. Then got natural reinforcers. Listened to last story perfectly!
Set 2 - #18, 1 - #5, 3 - #17. Heavy, heavy DRO for beautiful sitting, paying
attn & eye contact. DRO'd no weird mouth stuff. He got to read two stories b/c he was
so good. Nice job.
P.N. - Pls. pick four (4) that haven't been done this week.
9, 15, 20, 24 various sets. He did great. Stood perfectly. Heavy DRO. Everything
wonderful: e.c., attn. Got to read story of his choice.
P.N. - Pls. ask a ? or two after each story to probe comprehension (don't grill
him though). Notes please!
P.N. - Pls. do 1-4, 6-18, 12 & 13.
Did pretty well. Able to answer most ?s except for last two stories (12 &
13). He was trying to read them through the back of the paper. DRO'd when he didn't do
this & did look nicely and sat well. Talked about natural reinforcer - reading story
himself. Didn't get opportunity b/c of behavior at end.
2-11, 2-15, 3-16, 1-20. Nice job. Lots of DRO for e.c. Presented two choices of
reinforcer in the beg. Worked nicely. Only weird thing he keeps doing is trying to read
back of pg. when you read to him. Questioning comprehension was very good. He was really
w/it. DRO'd rapidity of answers too!
P.N. - Please do 1,14,7,12,13,14,17,19,20 (random).
Excellent job. Sat beautifully. Listened and answered ?s immediately. Lots of
DRO for great behaviors. He got to read "grownups" story for good listening.
P.N. - Please do 1,4,7,12,13 (& 3 others, random).
1,4,7,12,13,10,11,6 - Not great. He was looking at back of sheet again trying to
read words as I said story. I heavily DRO'd e.c. & paying attn & answered quickly
& correctly -- this was ok, but at end he threw fit (crying & crawling on me) when
I started to read "grownups" story. Said that only HE reads that story. I told
him neutrally that I'm not going to argue w/him & he needs to sit down & get in
control. He yelled "stop!" and "no!" as I spoke & tried to grab
stories from me, but after about three min calmed down & went to his seat. I read
story & DRO'd getting in control. He didn't get to read a story this time.
P.N. - Vary sets & order 1,4,7,12,13 (& 3 others not done this wk).
Did above plus 8,18,20. Rigid at 1st about how his toy was positioned. Took a
long time to come back to chair. Neutrally told him I have to put it away. He stopped.
DRO'd flexibility. Let me read all of stories w/o looking at back of paper or arguing.
DRO'd both. Sat beautifully. Got to read stories. Nat reinforcer when finished.
2, 14-17, 19. Random order & sets. Decided in beg that he'd get to read
grownup story if he listened the first time, answered ?s & was attentive. He didn't
get to do it b/c he couldn't answer ?s Did "daydreaming" incidentally to sort of
remind him about listening. DRO'd good sitting & e.c. when he gave it. Also watched
for his reading bulk of stories. DRO'd as soon as he gave me good e.c. This was hard for
him. I redirected a lot of this "back reading" by putting the paper down &
completely improvising or saying some stories from memory. I picked up again when e.c. was
good. DRO'd this heavily. Better by the time we were finished.
P.N. - Pls. do 3,5,9,21,22 (plus 3 others, random sets & order).
8,18,2 and all of the above. Lots of DRO for not reading back of stories.
Challenged him not to do it. He liked this and lived up to his side of bargain. There were
lots of S behaviors w/his mouth - lip biting, some grimacing, lots of yawning &
stretching too. I physically intervened while reading stories (stretching - neutrally
lowered his hands). DRO'd when these behaviors decreased in any degree.
P.N. - Pls. do any 8, random sets & order.
3,5,9,11,14,16,19,21 (random order/sets). He was great. Lots of DRO. Only tried
to look at paper 1x. No faces, great e.c. & sitting. Asked me to read "grownups
are NOT different from kids". Funny.
P.N. - Pls. do any 7, random sets & order.
He sat quietly. No weird things, except a little glassy-eyed, but this didn't
interfere w/answering ?s to stories. Did 1,4,7,9,11,15 16,20. He got to read 1 story as
natural reinforcer. Interrupted about 2x while I read but then stopped midway and let me
finish up. DRO'd this after I was finished. Also DRO'd great sitting & paying attn.
2,3,6,12,13,17,18. Sitting was good. Some shirt-twirling that didn't interfere
or escalate so I let it go. He answered ?s well. Asked to read "daydreaming"
story but I gave him "I must talk" instead and he was ok with that. DRO'd lack
of rigidity. At the end DRO'd sitting quietly, paying attn., etc. Stressed being polite
& listening to grownups as alternative to being rude in answered ?s. Prompted
self-pride at end by asking ?s.
P.N. - Pls. do 8, random set & order.
3,5,7,1,15,20,22,12 [by this time, one of these was always circled denoting the
one HE got to read, sometimes w/his name next to it]. Beautiful sitting. No weird stuff.
There was a little daydreaming so I did that story. He "woke up" and I
reinforcer this later. Answered ?s nicely. DRO'd attn & e.c. Got to do #12 as a
natural reinforcer. Nice job.
20,21,22,8,10,14,19,5, random set & order. Great job. Talked about being
quietly in beg & why he did well at end b/c he was being quiet. Got to read one -- he
knows what number EVERY story is.
4,7,8 [- name], 10,11,19,5 - Bookeneded not interrupting. Did a great job. Sat
quietly during stories. Lots of DRO. Answered. ?s well.
P.N. - The order of the stories are now changed.
3,13,15,14,22,19. Pretty zoney. I tried to be very animated & upbeat. Asked
?s about the stories & tried to relate them all to his experience at [location] today.
When I talked about this he seemed to wake up more. DRO'd his answering & sitting
nicely.
P.N. - [therapist name:] pls. do set 1, 8-12. Any set 11 & 19 and 4 more,
random sets & order.
(1) 8 & 12, 11, 19, 2, 5, 7 [-name], 14. With [brother] in room. He was
sorta zoney. Looking at things on floor & playing w/sock. Gesture prompts worked for
things that interrupted w/listening. DRO'd paying good attn.
P.N. - [therapist name:] please do set 2, #8 & 12; any set #11 & 19 and
four more, random sets & order.
2,8,12,11,19,24,21. Brother was in rm. Did #8 - came back later to finish when
brother was out so he can pay better attn. Did #12 twice and he didn't pay attn. Totally
daydreaming so I did "daydreaming". Did others throughout session b/c he was so
rigid when I had stopped initially. Better later on in session. DRO'd flexibility.
P.N. - Pls. avoid doing this when [brother] is in the room and NEVER do this as
your opening drill in a session.
P.N. - [therapist name:], please do #2, 14 and four more.
All random - set 1 - #2,14,7,9,15,10. Totally zoney w/this drill. Brother was in
room but that wasn't the problem. I had him stand up while I did some. This improved his
attn slightly but not enough. Tried to break it up w/other things like categories &
answering quickly for attn.
P.N. - Please do 2 and 14 and four more.
2,5,8,11,12,14 - Random order & sets. Eye contact was very down in beg and
was impairing his performance as he couldn't answered ?s (I used no equiv. during answered
to ?s and occasionally during stories b/c poor e.c. WAS IMPACTING ON PERF.) Heavily DRO'd
improved e.c. He didn't get chance to read a story b/c his attn was not good enough.
P.N. - Please continue targeting eye contact whether or NOT it impacts
performance! This is something to key into AFTER the SD is delivered in ALL VERBAL DRILLS.
DO NOT USE "no equivalents" DURING stories...Treat the stories as if the entire
story was an SD. We're not targeting e.c. DURING the story yet -- still need to work on
processing the information. Remember this is SHAPING. Instead, read the story, ask the Q
and if he zones give a "no equivalent" like "uh uh; pay attention and
you'll get it" and go back to SD. UNDER NO CIRCUMSTANCES should a NO be delivered for
eye contact during the SD (story).
P.N. (continued):
SOCIAL STORY + ???? = SD (Don't require e.c. - reinforcer (Processing) if you
get it though!) (Response)
3,4,6 [name], 13,16,17 - random order/sets. Did not require e.c. during story
& question (SD), but dro'd it & put it in DRO for correct answered w/self pride -
e.g., "I'll bet you gave me such a beautiful answer b/c you looked at me and listened
carefully." He used concept of paying attn carefully here. Lots of DRO. Some
squirming in chair but great attn & e.c. Answered ?s beautifully. P.N. - Perfect!!!!
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